robert falconer-第142章

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entrance　into　the　premises　of　the　respectable　firm　of　Vension；　Port；

&　Co。'



'But　you　mustn't　be　too　hard　upon　him；　Falconer；　for　if　his　God　is

his　belly；　how　can　he　regard　suicide　as　other　than　the　most　awful

sacrilege？'



'Of　course　not。　　His　well…fed　divinity　gives　him　one　great

commandment：　〃Thou　shalt　love　thyself　with　all　thy　heart。　　The　great

breach　is　to　hurt　thyselfworst　of　all　to　send　thyself　away　from

the　land　of　luncheons　and　dinners；　to　the　country　of　thought　and

vision。〃　　But；　alas！　he　does　not　reflect　on　the　fact　that　the　god

Belial　does　not　feed　all　his　votaries；　that　he　has　his　elect；　that

the　altar　of　his　inner…temple　too　often　smokes　with　no　sacrifice　of

which　his　poor　meagre　priests　may　partake。　　They　must　uphold　the

Divinity　which　has　been　good　to　them；　and　not　suffer　his　worship　to

fall　into　disrepute。'



'Really；　Robert；'　said　his　father；　'I　am　afraid　to　think　what　you

will　come　to。　　You　will　end　in　denying　there　is　a　God　at　all。　　You

don't　believe　in　hell；　and　now　you　justify　suicide。　　ReallyI　must

sayto　say　the　least　of　itI　have　not　been　accustomed　to　hear　such

things。'



The　poor　old　man　looked　feebly　righteous　at　his　wicked　son。　　I

verily　believe　he　was　concerned　for　his　eternal　fate。　　Falconer　gave

a　pleased　glance　at　me；　and　for　a　moment　said　nothing。　　Then　he

began；　with　a　kind　of　logical　composure：



'In　the　first　place；　father；　I　do　not　believe　in　such　a　God　as　some

people　say　they　believe　in。　　Their　God　is　but　an　idol　of　the

heathen；　modified　with　a　few　Christian　qualities。　　For　hell；　I　don't

believe　there　is　any　escape　from　it　but　by　leaving　hellish　things

behind。　　For　suicide；　I　do　not　believe　it　is　wicked　because　it　hurts

yourself；　but　I　do　believe　it　is　very　wicked。　　I　only　want　to　put　it

on　its　own　right　footing。'



'And　pray　what　do　you　consider　its　right　footing？'



'My　dear　father；　I　recognize　no　duty　as　owing　to　a　man's　self。

There　is　and　can　be　no　such　thing。　　I　am　and　can　be　under　no

obligation　to　myself。　　The　whole　thing　is　a　fiction；　and　of　evil

invention。　　It　comes　from　the　upper　circles　of　the　hell　of

selfishness。　　Or；　perhaps；　it　may　with　some　be　merely　a　form　of

metaphysical　mistake；　but　an　untruth　it　is。　　Then　for　the　duty　we　do

owe　to　other　people：　how　can　we　expect　the　men　or　women　who　have

found　life　to　end；　as　it　seems　to　them；　in　a　dunghill　of　miseryhow

can　we　expect　such　to　understand　any　obligation　to　live　for　the　sake

of　the　general　others；　to　no　individual　of　whom；　possibly；　do　they

bear　an　endurable　relation？　　What　remains？The　grandest；　noblest

duty　from　which　all　other　duty　springs：　the　duty　to　the　possible

God。　Mind；　I　say　possible　God；　for　I　judge　it　the　first　of　my　duties

towards　my　neighbour　to　regard　his　duty　from　his　position；　not　from

mine。'



'But；'　said　I；　'how　would　you　bring　that　duty　to　bear　on　the　mind　of

a　suicide？'



'I　think　some　of　the　tempted　could　understand　it；　though　I　fear　not

one　of　those　could　who　judge　them　hardly；　and　talk　sententiously　of

the　wrong　done　to　a　society　which　has　done　next　to　nothing　for　her；

by　the　poor；　starved；　refused；　husband…tortured　wretch　perhaps；　who

hurries　at　last　to　the　might　of　the　filthy　flowing　river　which；　the

one　thread　of　hope　in　the　web　of　despair；　crawls　through　the　city　of

death。　　What　should　I　say　to　him？　　I　should　say：　〃God　liveth：　thou

art　not　thine　own　but　his。　　Bear　thy　hunger；　thy　horror　in　his　name。

I　in　his　name　will　help　thee　out　of　them；　as　I　may。　　To　go　before

he　calleth　thee；　is　to　say　'Thou　forgettest；'　unto　him　who　numbereth

the　hairs　of　thy　head。　　Stand　out　in　the　cold　and　the　sleet　and　the

hail　of　this　world；　O　son　of　man；　till　thy　Father　open　the　door　and

call　thee。　　Yea；　even　if　thou　knowest　him　not；　stand　and　wait；　lest

there　should　be；　after　all；　such　a　loving　and　tender　one；　who；　for

the　sake　of　a　good　with　which　thou　wilt　be　all…content；　and　without

which　thou　never　couldst　be　content；　permits　thee　there　to

standfor　a　timelong　to　his　sympathizing　as　well　as　to　thy

suffering　heart。〃'



Here　Falconer　paused；　and　when　he　spoke　again　it　was　from　the

ordinary　level　of　conversation。　　Indeed　I　fancied　that　he　was　a

little　uncomfortable　at　the　excitement　into　which　his　feelings　had

borne　him。



'Not　many　of　them　could　understand　this；　I　dare　say：　but　I　think

most　of　them　could　feel　it　without　understanding　it。　　Certainly　the

〃belly　with　good　capon　lined〃　will　neither　understand　nor　feel　it。

Suicide　is　a　sin　against　God；　I　repeat；　not　a　crime　over　which

human　laws　have　any　hold。　　In　regard　to　such；　man　has　a　duty

alonethat；　namely；　of　making　it　possible　for　every　man　to　live。

And　where　the　dread　of　death　is　not　sufficient　to　deter；　what　can

the　threat　of　punishment　do？　　Or　what　great　thing　is　gained　if　it

should　succeed？　　What　agonies　a　man　must　have　gone　through　in　whom

neither　the　horror　of　falling　into　such　a　river；　nor　of　the　knife　in

the　flesh　instinct　with　life；　can　extinguish　the　vague　longing　to

wrap　up　his　weariness　in　an　endless　sleep！'



'But；'　I　remarked；　'you　would；　I　fear；　encourage　the　trade　in

suicide。　　Your　kindness　would　be　terribly　abused。　　What　would　you　do

with　the　pretended　suicides？'



'Whip　them；　for　trifling　with　and　trading　upon　the　feelings　of　their

kind。'



'Then　you　would　drive　them　to　suicide　in　earnest。'



'Then　they　might　be　worth　something；　which　they　were　not　before。'



'We　are　a　great　deal　too　humane　for　that　now…a…days；　I　fear。　　We

don't　like　hurting　people。'



'No。　We　are　infested　with　a　philanthropy　which　is　the　offspring　of

our　mammon…worship。　　But　surely　our　tender　mercies　are　cruel。　　We

don't　like　to　hang　people；　however　unfit　they　may　be　to　live　amongst

their　fellows。　　A　weakling　pity　will　petition　for　the　life　of　the

worst　murdererbut　for　what？　　To　keep　him　alive　in　a　confinement　as

like　their　notion　of　hell　as　they　dare　to　make　itnamely；　a　place

whence　all　the　sweet　visitings　of　the　grace　of　God　are　withdrawn；

and　the　man　has　not　a　chance；　so　to　speak；　of　growing　better。　　In

this　hell　of　theirs　they　will　even　pamper　his　beastly　body。'



'They　have　the　chaplain　to　visit　them。'



'I　pity　the　chaplain；　cut　off　in　his　labours　from　all　the　aids　which

God's　world　alone　can　give　for　the　teaching　of　these　men。　　Human

beings　have　not　the　right　to　inflict　such　cruel　punishment　upon

their　fellow…man。　　It　springs　from　a　cowardly　shrinking　from

responsibility；　and　from　mistrust　of　the　mercy　of　God；perhaps

first　of　all　from　an　over…valuing　of　the　mere　life　of　the　body。

Hanging　is　tenderness　itself　to　such　a　punishment。'



'I　think　you　are　hardly　fair；　though；　Falconer。　　It　is　the　fear　of

sending　them　to　hell　that　prevents　them　from　hanging　them。'



'Yes。　You　are　right；　I　dare　say。　　They　are　not　of　David's　mind；　who

would　rather　fall　into　the　hands　of　God　than　of　men。　　They　think

their　hell　is　not　so　hard　as　his；　and　may　be　better　for　them。　　But　I

must　not；　as　you　say；　forget　that　they　do　believe　their　everlasting

fate　hangs　upon　their　hands；　for　if　God　once　gets　his　hold　of　them

by　death；　they　are　lost　for　ever。'



'But　the　chaplain　may　awake　them　to　a　sense　of　their　sins。'



'I　do　not　think　it　is　likely　that　talk　will　do　what　the　discipline

of　life　has　not　done。　　It　seems　to　me；　on　the　contrary；　that　the

clergyman　has　no　commission　to　rouse　people　to　a　sense　of　their

sins。　　That　is　not　his　work。　　He　is　far　more　likely　to　harden　them

by　any　attempt　in　that　direction。　　Every　man　does　feel　his　sins；

though　he　often　does　not　know　it。　　To　turn　his　attention　away　from

what　he　does　feel　by　trying　to　rouse　in　him　feelings　which　are

impossible　to　him　in　his　present　condition；　is　to　do　him　a　great

wrong。　　The　clergyman　has　the　message　of　salvation；　not　of　sin；　to

give。　　Whatever　oppression　is　on　a　man；　whatever　trouble；　whatever

conscious　something　that　comes　between　him　and　the　blessedness　of

life；　is　his　sin；　for　whatever　is　not　of　faith　is　sin；　and　f