rambling idle excursion-第12章

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The　Bermudians　are　hoping　soon　to　have　telegraphic　communication　with　the
world。　　But　even　after　they　shall　have　acquired　this　curse　it　will　still
be　a　good　country　to　go　to　for　a　vacation；　for　there　are　charming　little
islets　scattered　about　the　inclosed　sea　where　one　could　live　secure　from
interruption。　　The　telegraph…boy　would　have　to　come　in　a　boat；　and　one
could　easily　kill　him　while　he　was　making　his　landing。

We　had　spent　four　days　in　Bermudathree　bright　ones　out　of　doors　and　one
rainy　one　in　the　house；　we　being　disappointed　about　getting　a　yacht　for　a
sail；　and　now　our　furlough　was　ended；　and　we　entered　into　the　ship　again
and　sailed　homeward。

We　made　the　run　home　to　New　York　quarantine　in　three　days　and　five　hours；
and　could　have　gone　right　along　up　to　the　city　if　we　had　had　a　health
permit。　　But　health　permits　are　not　granted　after　seven　in　the　evening；
partly　because　a　ship　cannot　be　inspected　and　overhauled　with　exhaustive；
thoroughness　except　in　daylight；　and　partly　because　health…officers　are
liable　to　catch　cold　if　they　expose　themselves　to　the　night　air。　　Still；
you　can　buy　a　permit　after　hours　for　five　dollars　extra；　and　the　officer
will　do　the　inspecting　next　week。　　Our　ship　and　passengers　lay　under
expense　and　in　humiliating　captivity　all　night；　under　the　very　nose　of
the　little　official　reptile　who　is　supposed　to　protect　New　York　from
pestilence　by　his　vigilant　〃inspections。〃　　This　imposing　rigor　gave
everybody　a　solemn　and　awful　idea　of　the　beneficent　watchfulness　of　our
government；　and　there　were　some　who　wondered　if　anything　finer　could　be
found　in　other　countries。

In　the　morning　we　were　all　a…tiptoe　to　witness　the　intricate　ceremony　of
inspecting　the　ship。　　But　it　was　a　disappointing　thing。　　The　health…
officer's　tug　ranged　alongside　for　a　moment；　our　purser　handed　the　lawful
three…dollar　permit　fee　to　the　health…officer's　bootblack；　who　passed　us
a　folded　paper　in　a　forked　stick；　and　away　we　went。　　The　entire
〃inspection〃　did　not　occupy　thirteen　seconds。

The　health…officer's　place　is　worth　a　hundred　thousand　dollars　a　year　to
him。　　His　system　of　inspection　is　perfect；　and　therefore　cannot　be
improved　on；　but　it　seems　to　me　that　his　system　of　collecting　his　fees
might　be　amended。　　For　a　great　ship　to　lie　idle　all　night　is　a　most
costly　loss　of　time；　for　her　passengers　to　have　to　do　the　same　thing
works　to　them　the　same　damage；　with　the　addition　of　an　amount　of
exasperation　and　bitterness　of　soul　that　the　spectacle　of　that　health…
officer's　ashes　on　a　shovel　could　hardly　sweeten。　　Now　why　would　it　not
be　better　and　simpler　to　let　the　ships　pass　in　unmolested；　and　the　fees
and　permits　be　exchanged　once　a　year　by　post。







End