2 new moon新月-第68章

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〃Yeah。〃　Then　he　sniffed　my　hair　and　said；　〃Ew。〃　

〃What？〃　I　demanded。　I　looked　up　to　see　that　his　nose　was　wrinkled　again。　〃Why　does　everyone　keep　
doing　that　to　me？　I　don't　smell！〃　

He　smiled　a　little。　〃Yes；　you　do—you　smell　like　them。　Blech。　Too　sweet—sickly　sweet。　And…　icy。　It　
burns　my　nose。〃　

〃Really？〃　That　was　strange。　Alice　smelled　unbelievably　wonderful。　To　a　human；　anyway。　〃But　why　would　
Alice　think　I　smelled；　too；　then？〃　

That　wiped　his　smile　away。　〃Huh。　Maybe　I　don't　smell　so　good　to　her；　either。　Huh。〃　

〃Well；　you　both　smell　fine　to　me。〃　I　rested　my　head　against　him　again。　I　was　going　to　miss　him　terribly　
when　he　walked　out　my　door。　It　was　a　nasty　catch…22—on　the　one　hand；　I　wanted　Alice　to　stay　forever。　
I　was　going　to　die—metaphorically—when　she　left　me。　But　how　was　I　supposed　to　go　without　seeing　
Jake　for　any　length　of　time？　What　a　mess；　I　thought　again。　

〃I'll　miss　you；〃　Jacob　whispered；　echoing　my　thoughts。　〃Every　minute。　I　hope　she　leaves　soon。〃　

〃It　really　doesn't　have　to　be　that　way；　Jake。〃　

He　sighed。　〃Yes；　it　really　does。　Bella。　You…　love　her。　So　I'd　better　not　get　anywhere　near　her。　I'm　not　
sure　that　I'm　even…tempered　enough　to　handle　that。　Sam　would　be　mad　if　I　broke　the　treaty；　and〃—his　
voice　turned　sarcastic—〃you　probably　wouldn't　like　it　too　much　if　I　killed　your　friend。〃　

I　recoiled　from　him　when　he　said　that；　but　he　only　tightened　his　arms；　refusing　to　let　me　escape。　〃There's　
no　point　in　avoiding　the　truth。　That's　the　way　things　are；　Bells。〃　

〃I　do　not　like　the　way　things　are。〃　

Jacob　freed　one　arm　so　that　he　could　cup　his　big　brown　hand　under　my　chin　and　make　me　look　at　him。　
〃Yeah。　It　was　easier　when　we　were　both　human；　wasn't　it？〃　

I　sighed。　

We　stared　at　each　other　for　a　long　moment。　His　hand　smoldered　against　my　skin。　In　my　face；　I　knew　
there　was　nothing　but　wistful　sadness—I　didn't　want　to　have　to　say　goodbye　now；　no　matter　for　how　
short　a　time。　At　first　his　face　reflected　mine；　but　then；　as　neither　of　us　looked　away；　his　expression　
changed。　

He　released　me；　lifting　his　other　hand　to　brush　his　fingertips　along　my　cheek；　trailing　them　down　to　my　
jaw。　I　could　feel　his　fingers　tremble—not　with　anger　this　time。　He　pressed　his　palm　against　my　cheek；　so　
that　my　face　was　trapped　between　his　burning　hands。　

〃Bella；〃　he　whispered。　

I　was　frozen。　

No！　I　hadn't　made　this　decision　yet。　I　didn't　know　if　I　could　do　this；　and　now　I　was　out　of　time　to　think。　
But　I　would　have　been　a　fool　if　I　thought　rejecting　him　now　would　have　no　consequences。　

I　stared　back　at　him。　He　was　not　my　Jacob；　but　he　could　be。　His　face　was　familiar　and　beloved。　In　so　
many　real　ways；　I　did　love　him。　He　was　my　comfort；　my　safe　harbor。　Right　now；　I　could　choose　to　have　
him　belong　to　me。　

Alice　was　back　for　the　moment；　but　that　changed　nothing。　True　love　was　forever　lost。　The　prince　was　
never　coming　back　to　kiss　me　awake　from　my　enchanted　sleep。　I　was　not　a　princess；　after　all。　So　what　
was　the　fairy…tale　protocol　for　other　kisses？　The　mundane　kind　that　didn't　break　any　spells？　

Maybe　it　would　be　easy—like　holding　his　hand　or　having　his　arms　around　me。　Maybe　it　would　feel　nice。　
Maybe　it　wouldn't　feel　like　a　betrayal。　Besides；　who　was　I　betraying；　anyway？　Just　myself。　

Keeping　his　eyes　on　mine；　Jacob　began　to　bend　his　face　toward　me。　And　I　was　still　absolutely　
undecided。　

The　shrill　ring　of　the　phone　made　us　both　jump；　but　it　did　not　break　his　focus。　He　took　his　hand　from　
under　my　chin　and　reached　over　me　to　grab　the　receiver；　but　still　held　my　face　securely　with　the　hand　
against　my　cheek。　His　dark　eyes　did　not　free　mine。　I　was　too　muddled　to　react；　even　to　take　advantage　
of　the　distraction。　

〃Swan　residence；〃　Jacob　said；　his　husky　voice　low　and　intense。　

Someone　answered；　and　Jacob　altered　in　an　instant。　He　straightened　up；　and　his　hand　dropped　from　my　
face。　His　eyes　went　flat；　his　face　blank；　and　I　would　have　bet　the　measly　remainder　of　my　college　f　and　
that　it　was　Alice。　

I　recovered　myself　and　held　out　my　hand　for　the　phone。　Jacob　ignored　me。　

〃He's　not　here；〃　Jacob　said；　and　the　words　were　menacing。　

There　was　some　very　short　reply；　a　request　for　more　information　it　seemed；　because　he　added　
unwillingly；　〃He's　at　the　funeral。〃　

Then　Jacob　hung　up　the　phone。　〃Filthy　bloodsucker；〃　he　muttered　under　his　breath。　The　face　he　turned　
back　to　me　was　the　bitter　mask　again。　

〃Who　did　you　just　hang　up　on？〃　I　gasped；　infuriated。　〃In　my　house；　and　on　my　phone？〃　

〃Easy！　He　hung　up　on　me！〃　

〃He？　Who　was　it？！〃　

He　sneered　the　title。　〃Dr。　Carlisle　Cullen。〃　

〃Why　didn't　you　let　me　talk　to　him？！〃　

〃He　didn't　ask　for　you；〃　Jacob　said　coldly。　His　face　was　smooth；　expressionless；　but　his　hands　shook。　
〃He　asked　where　Charlie　was　and　I　told　him。　I　don't　think　I　broke　any　rules　of　etiquette。〃　

〃You　listen　to　me；　Jacob　Black—〃　

But　he　obviously　wasn't　listening。　He　looked　quickly　over　his　shoulder；　as　if　someone　had　called　his　name　
from　the　other　room。　His　eyes　went　wide　and　his　body　stiff；　then　he　started　trembling。　I　listened　too；　
automatically；　but　heard　nothing。　

〃Bye；　Bells；〃　he　spit　out；　and　wheeled　toward　the　front　door。　

I　ran　after　him。　〃What　is　it？〃　

And　then　I　ran　into　him；　as　he　rocked　back　on　his　heels；　cussing　under　his　breath。　He　spun　around　again；　
knocking　me　sideways。　I　bobbled　and　fell　to　the　floor；　my　legs　tangled　with　his。　

〃Shoot；　ow！〃　I　protested　as　he　hurriedly　jerked　his　legs　free　one　at　a　time。　

I　struggled　to　pull　myself　up　as　he　darted　for　the　back　door；　he　suddenly　froze　again。　

Alice　stood　motionless　at　the　foot　of　the　stairs。　

〃Bella；〃　she　choked。　

I　scrambled　to　my　feet　and　lurched　to　her　side。　Her　eyes　were　dazed　and　far　away；　her　face　drawn　and　
whiter　than　bone。　Her　slim　body　trembled　to　an　inner　turmoil。　

〃Alice；　what's　wrong？〃　I　cried。　I　put　my　hands　on　her　face；　trying　to　calm　her。　

Her　eyes　focused　on　mine　abruptly；　wide　with　pain。　

〃Edward；〃　was　all　she　whispered。　

My　body　reacted　faster　than　my　mind　was　able　to　catch　up　with　the　implications　of　her　reply。　I　didn't　at　
first　understand　why　the　room　was　spinning　or　where　the　hollow　roar　in　my　ears　was　coming　from。　My　
mind　labored；　unable　to　make　sense　of　Alice's　bleak　face　and　how　it　could　possibly　relate　to　Edward；　
while　my　body　was　already　swaying；　seeking　the　relief　of　unconsciousness　before　the　reality　could　hit　me。　

The　stairway　tilted　at　the　oddest　angle。　

Jacob's　furious　voice　was　suddenly　in　my　ear；　hissing　out　a　stream　of　profanities。　I　felt　a　vague　
disapproval。　His　new　friends　were　clearly　a　bad　influence。　

I　was　on　the　couch　without　understanding　how　I　got　there；　and　Jacob　was　still　swearing。　It　felt　like　there　
was　an　earthquake—the　couch　was　shaking　under　me。　

〃What　did　you　do　to　her？〃　he　demanded。　

Alice　ignored　him。　〃Bella？　Bella；　snap　out　of　it。　We　have　to　hurry。〃　

〃Stay　back；〃　Jacob　warned。　

〃Calm　down；　Jacob　Black；〃　Alice　ordered。　〃You　don't　want　to　do　that　so　close　to　her。〃　

〃I　don't　think　I'll　have　any　problem　keeping　my　focus；〃　he　retorted；　but　his　voice　sounded　a　little　cooler。　

〃Alice？〃　My　voice　was　weak。　〃What　happened？〃　I　asked；　even　though　I　didn't　want　to　hear。　

〃I　don't　know；〃　she　suddenly　wailed。　〃What　is　he　thinking？！〃　

I　labored　to　pull　myself　up　despite　the　dizziness。　I　realized　it　was　Jacob's　arm　I　was　gripping　for　balance。　
He　was　the　one　shaking；　not　the　couch。　

Alice　was　pulling　a　small　silver　phone　from　her　bag　when　my　eyes　relocated　her。　Her　fingers　dialed　the　
numbers　so　fast　they　were　a　blur。　

〃Rose；　I　need　to　talk　to　Carlisle　now。〃　Her　voice　whipped　through　the　words。　〃Fine；　as　soon　as　he's　
back。　No；　I'll　be　on　a　plane。　Look；　have　you　heard　anything　from　Edward？〃　

Alice　paused　now；　listening　with　an　expression　that　grew　more　appalled　every　second。　Her　mouth　
opened　into　a　little　O　of　horror；　and　the　phone　shook　in　her　hand。　

〃Why？〃　she　gasped。　〃Why　would　you　do　that；　Rosalie？〃　

Whatever　the　answer　was；　it　made　her　jaw　tighten　in　anger。　Her　eyes　flashed　and　narrowed。　

〃Well；　you're　wrong　on　both　counts；　though；　Rosalie；　so　that　would　be　a　problem；　don't　you