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第44章

burlesques-第44章

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dried Welsh; which he always took; he made me a present; saying; in

front of the line; 〃Accept this; Mr。 Gahagan; as a token of respect

from the first to the bravest officer in the army。〃



Calculating the snuff to be worth a halfpenny; I should say that

fourpence was about the value of this gift: but it has at least

this good effectit serves to convince any person who doubts my

story; that the facts of it are really true。  I have left it at the

office of my publisher; along with the extract from the Bengal

Hurkaru; and anybody may examine both by applying in the counting…

house of Mr。 Cunningham。*  That once popular expression; or

proverb; 〃are you up to snuff?〃 arose out of the above circumstance;

for the officers of my corps; none of whom; except myself; had

ventured on the storming…party; used to twit me about this modest

reward for my labors。  Never mind! when they want me to storm a fort

AGAIN; I shall know better。





* The Major certainly offered to leave an old snuff…box at Mr。

Cunningham's office; but it contained no extract from a newspaper;

and does not QUITE prove that he killed a rhinoceros and stormed

fourteen intrenchments at the siege of Allyghur。





Well; immediately after the capture of this important fortress;

Perron; who had been the life and soul of Scindiah's army; came in

to us; with his family and treasure; and was passed over to the

French settlements at Chandernagur。  Bourquien took his command;

and against him we now moved。  The morning of the 11th of September

found us upon the plains of Delhi。



It was a burning hot day; and we were all refreshing ourselves

after the morning's march; when I; who was on the advanced piquet

along with O'Gawler of the King's Dragoons; was made aware of the

enemy's neighborhood in a very singular manner。  O'Gawler and I

were seated under a little canopy of horse…cloths; which we had

formed to shelter us from the intolerable heat of the sun; and were

discussing with great delight a few Manilla cheroots; and a stone

jar of the most exquisite; cool; weak; refreshing sangaree。  We had

been playing cards the night before; and O'Gawler had lost to me

seven hundred rupees。  I emptied the last of the sangaree into the

two pint tumblers out of which we were drinking; and holding mine

up; said; 〃Here's better luck to you next time; O'Gawler!〃



As I spoke the wordswhish!a cannon…ball cut the tumbler clean

out of my hand; and plumped into poor O'Gawler's stomach。  It

settled him completely; and of course I never got my seven hundred

rupees。  Such are the uncertainties of war!



To strap on my sabre and my accoutrementsto mount my Arab

chargerto drink off what O'Gawler had left of the sangareeand

to gallop to the General; was the work of a moment。  I found him as

comfortably at tiffin as if he were at his own house in London。



〃General;〃 said I; as soon as I got into his paijamahs (or tent);

〃you must leave your lunch if you want to fight the enemy。〃



〃The enemypsha! Mr。 Gahagan; the enemy is on the other side of

the river。〃



〃I can only tell your Excellency that the enemy's guns will hardly

carry five miles; and that Cornet O'Gawler was this moment shot

dead at my side with a cannon…ball。〃



〃Ha! is it so?〃 said his Excellency; rising; and laying down the

drumstick of a grilled chicken。  〃Gentlemen; remember that the eyes

of Europe are upon us; and follow me!〃



Each aide…de…camp started from table and seized his cocked hat;

each British heart beat high at the thoughts of the coming melee。

We mounted our horses and galloped swiftly after the brave old

General; I not the last in the train; upon my famous black charger。



It was perfectly true; the enemy were posted in force within three

miles of our camp; and from a hillock in the advance to which we

galloped; we were enabled with our telescopes to see the whole of

his imposing line。  Nothing can better describe it than this:



        _________________________________

       /。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。 A

      /。

     /。

    /。

   /。





A is the enemy; and the dots represent the hundred and twenty

pieces of artillery which defended his line。  He was; moreover;

intrenched; and a wide morass in his front gave him an additional

security。



His Excellency for a moment surveyed the line; and then said;

turning round to one of his aides…de…camp; 〃Order up Major…General

Tinkler and the cavalry。〃



〃HERE; does your Excellency mean?〃 said the aide…de…camp; surprised;

for the enemy had perceived us; and the cannon…balls were flying

about as thick as peas。



〃HERE; sir!〃 said the old General; stamping with his foot in a

passion; and the A。D。C。 shrugged his shoulders and galloped away。

In five minutes we heard the trumpets in our camp; and in twenty

more the greater part of the cavalry had joined us。



Up they came; five thousand men; their standards flapping in the

air; their long line of polished jack…boots gleaming in the golden

sunlight。  〃And now we are here;〃 said Major…General Sir Theophilus

Tinkler; 〃what next?〃  〃Oh; d… it;〃 said the Commander…in…Chief;

〃charge; chargenothing like charginggallopinggunsrascally

black scoundrelscharge; charge!〃  And then turning round to me

(perhaps he was glad to change the conversation); he said;

〃Lieutenant Gahagan; you will stay with me。〃



And well for him I did; for I do not hesitate to say that the

battle WAS GAINED BY ME。  I do not mean to insult the reader by

pretending that any personal exertions of mine turned the day;

that I killed; for instance; a regiment of cavalry or swallowed a

battery of guns;such absurd tales would disgrace both the hearer

and the teller。  I; as is well known; never say a single word which

cannot be proved; and hate more than all other vices the absurd sin

of egotism; I simply mean that my ADVICE to the General; at a

quarter past two o'clock in the afternoon of that day; won this

great triumph for the British army。



Gleig; Mill; and Thorn have all told the tale of this war; though

somehow they have omitted all mention of the hero of it。  General

Lake; for the victory of that day; became Lord Lake of Laswaree。

Laswaree! and who; forsooth; was the real conqueror of Laswaree?  I

can lay my hand upon my heart and say that I was。  If any proof is

wanting of the fact; let me give it at once; and from the highest

military testimony in the worldI mean that of the Emperor

Napoleon。



In the month of March; 1817; I was passenger on board the 〃Prince

Regent;〃 Captain Harris; which touched at St。 Helena on its passage

from Calcutta to England。  In company with the other officers on

board the ship; I paid my respects to the illustrious exile of

Longwood; who received us in his garden; where he was walking

about; in a nankeen dress and a large broad…brimmed straw…hat; with

General Montholon; Count Las Casas; and his son Emanuel; then a

little boy; who I dare say does not recollect me; but who

nevertheless played with my sword…knot and the tassels of my

Hessian boots during the whole of our interview with his Imperial

Majesty。



Our names were read out (in a pretty accent; by the way!) by

General Montholon; and the Emperor; as each was pronounced; made a

bow to the owner of it; but did not vouchsafe a word。  At last

Montholon came to mine。  The Emperor looked me at once in the face;

took his hands out of his pockets; put them behind his back; and

coming up to me smiling; pronounced the following words:



〃Assaye; Delhi; Deeg; Futtyghur?〃



I blushed; and taking off my hat with a bow; said〃Sire; c'est

moi。〃



〃Parbleu! je le savais bien;〃 said the Emperor; holding out his

snuff…box。  〃En usez…vous; Major?〃  I took a large pinch (which;

with the honor of speaking to so great a man; brought the tears

into my eyes); and he continued as nearly as possible in the

following words:



〃Sir; you are known; you come of an heroic nat

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