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第75章

the ivory child-第75章

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in their way; so why should I give her the /Bayéte/; unless it is hers

by right of blood; although I am only a little 'yellow dog' as she

chose to call me?〃



As this ridiculous point seemed to weigh upon his mind I told him that

Mameena was not even of royal blood and in nowise entitled to the

salute of kings。



〃Ah!〃 he said with a feeble grin; 〃then now I shall know how to deal

with her; especially as she cannot pretend that I did not play my part

in the battle; as she bade me do。 Did you see anything of her when

Jana charged; Baas; because I thought I did?〃



〃I seemed to see something; but no doubt it was only a fancy。〃



〃A fancy? Explain to me; Baas; where truths end and fancies begin and

whether what we think are fancies are not sometimes the real truths。

Once or twice I have thought so of late; Baas。〃



I could not answer this riddle; so instead I gave him some water which

he asked for; and he continued:



〃Baas; have you any messages for the two Shining ones; for her whose

name is holy and her sister; and for the child of her whose name is

holy; the Missie Marie; and for your reverend father; the Predikant?

If so; tell it quickly before my head grows too empty to hold the

words。〃



I will confess; however foolish it may seem; that I gave him certain

messages; but what they were I shall not write down。 Let them remain

secret between me and him。 Yes; between me and him and perhaps those

to whom they were to be delivered。 For after all; in his own words;

who can know exactly where fancies end and truth begin; and whether at

times fancies are not the veritable truths in this universal mystery

of which the individual life of each of us is so small a part?



Hans repeated what I had spoken to him word for word; as a native

does; repeated it twice over; after which he said he knew it by heart

and remained silent for a long while。 Then he asked me to lift him up

in the doorway of the cell so that he might look at the sun setting

for the last time; 〃for; Baas;〃 he added; 〃I think I am going far

beyond the sun。〃



He stared at it for a while; remarking that from the look of the sky

there should be fine weather coming; 〃which will be good for your

journey towards the Black Water; Baas; with all that ivory to carry。〃



I answered that perhaps I should never get the ivory from the

graveyard of the elephants; as the Black Kendah might prevent this。



〃No; no; Baas;〃 he replied; 〃now that Jana is dead the Black Kendah

will go away。 I know it; I know it!〃



Then he wandered for a space; speaking of sundry adventures we had

shared together; till quite before the last indeed; when his mind

returned to him。



〃Baas;〃 he said; 〃did not the captain Mavovo name me Light…in…

Darkness; and is not that my name? When you too enter the Darkness;

look for that Light; it will be shining very close to you。〃



He only spoke once more。 His words were:



〃Baas; I understand now what your reverend father; the Predikant;

meant when he spoke to me about Love last night。 It had nothing to do

with women; Baas; at least not much。 It was something a great deal

bigger; Baas; something as big as what I feel for you!〃



Then Hans died with a smile on his wrinkled face。



I wept!







CHAPTER XXI



HOMEWARDS



There is not much more to write of this expedition; or if that

statement be not strictly true; not much more that I wish to write;

though I have no doubt that Ragnall; if he had a mind that way; could

make a good and valuable book concerning many matters on which;

confining myself to the history of our adventure; I have scarcely

touched。 All the affinities between this Central African Worship of

the Heavenly Child and its Guardian and that of Horus and Isis in

Egypt from which it was undoubtedly descended; for instance。 Also the

part which the great serpent played therein; as it may be seen playing

a part in every tomb upon the Nile; and indeed plays a part in our own

and other religions。 Further; our journey across the desert to the Red

Sea was very interesting; but I am tired of describing journeysand

of making them。



The truth is that after the death of Hans; like to Queen Sheba when

she had surveyed the wonders of Solomon's court; there was no more

spirit in me。 For quite a long while I did not seem to care at all

what happened to me or to anybody else。 We buried him in a place of

honour; exactly where he shot Jana before the gateway of the second

court; and when the earth was thrown over his little yellow face I

felt as though half my past had departed with him into that hole。 Poor

drunken old Hans; where in the world shall I find such another man as

you were? Where in the world shall I find so much love as filled the

cup of that strange heart of yours?



I dare say it is a form of selfishness; but what every man desires is

something that cares for him /alone/; which is just why we are so fond

of dogs。 Now Hans was a dog with a human brain and he cared for me

alone。 Often our vanity makes us think that this has happened to some

of us in the instance of one or more women。 But honest and quiet

reflection may well cause us to doubt the truth of such supposings。

The woman who as we believed adored us solely has probably in the

course of her career adored others; or at any rate other things。



To take but one instance; that of Mameena; the Zulu lady whom Hans

thought he saw in the Shades。 She; I believe; did me the honour to be

very fond of me; but I am convinced that she was fonder still of her

ambition。 Now Hans never cared for any living creature; or for any

human hope or object; as he cared for me。 There was no man or woman

whom he would not have cheated; or even murdered for my sake。 There

was no earthly advantage; down to that of life itself; that he would

not; and in the end did not forgo for my sake; witness the case of his

little fortune which he invested in my rotten gold mine and thought

nothing of losingfor my sake。



That is love /in excelsis/; and the man who has succeeded in inspiring

it in any creature; even in a low; bibulous; old Hottentot; may feel

proud indeed。 At least I am proud and as the years go by the pride

increases; as the hope grows that somewhere in the quiet of that great

plain which he saw in his dream; I may find the light of Hans's love

burning like a beacon in the darkness; as he promised I should do; and

that it may guide and warm my shivering; new…born soul before I dare

the adventure of the Infinite。



Meanwhile; since the sublime and the ridiculous are so very near akin;

I often wonder how he and Mameena settled that question of her right

to the royal salute。 Perhaps I shall learn one dayindeed already I

have had a hint of it。 If so; even in the blaze of a new and universal

Truth; I am certain that their stories will differ wildly。







Hans was quite right about the Black Kendah。 They cleared out;

probably in search of food; where I do not know and I do not care;

though whether this were a temporary or permanent move on their part

remains; and so far as I am concerned is likely to remain; veiled in

obscurity。 They were great blackguards; though extraordinarily fine

soldiers; and what became of them is a matter of complete indifference

to me。 One thing is certain; however; a very large percentage of them

never migrated at all; for something over three thousand of their

bodies did our people have to bury in the pass and about the temple; a

purpose for which all the pits and trenches we had dug came in very

useful。 Our loss; by the way; was five hundred and three; including

those who died of wounds。 It was a great fight and; except for those

who perished in the pitfalls during the first rush; all practically

hand to hand。



Jana we interred where he fell because we could not move him; within a

few feet of the body of his slayer Hans。 I have always regretted that

I did not take the exact m

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