crime and punishment(罪与罚)-第36章
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Raskolnikov picked up his hat and walked towards the door； but he
did not reach it。。。。
When he recovered consciousness； he found himself sitting in a
chair； supported by some one on the right side； while some one else
was standing on the left； holding a yellowish glass filled with yellow
water； and Nikodim Fomitch standing before him； looking intently at
him。 He got up from the chair。
〃What's this？ Are you ill？〃 Nikodim Fomitch asked； rather sharply。
〃He could hardly hold his pen when he was signing；〃 said the head
clerk； settling back in his place； and taking up his work again。
〃Have you been ill long？〃 cried Ilya Petrovitch from his place；
where he； too； was looking through papers。 He had； of course； come
to look at the sick man when he fainted； but retired at once when he
recovered。
〃Since yesterday；〃 muttered Raskolnikov in reply。
〃Did you go out yesterday？〃
〃Yes。〃
〃Though you were ill？〃
〃Yes。〃
〃At what time？〃
〃About seven。〃
〃And where did you go； my I ask？〃
〃Along the street。〃
〃Short and clear。〃
Raskolnikov； white as a handkerchief； had answered sharply； jerkily；
without dropping his black feverish eyes before Ilya Petrovitch's
stare。
〃He can scarcely stand upright。 And you。。。〃 Nikodim Fomitch was
beginning。
〃No matter；〃 Ilya Petrovitch pronounced rather peculiarly。
Nikodim Fomitch would have made some further protest； but glancing
at the head clerk who was looking very hard at him； he did not
speak。 There was a sudden silence。 It was strange。
〃Very well； then；〃 concluded Ilya Petrovitch； 〃we will not detain
you。〃
Raskolnikov went out。 He caught the sound of eager conversation on
his departure； and above the rest rose the questioning voice of
Nikodim Fomitch。 In the street； his faintness passed off completely。
〃A search… there will be a search at once；〃 he repeated to
himself； hurrying home。 〃The brutes！ they suspect。〃
His former terror mastered him completely again。
Chapter Two
〃AND WHAT if there has been a search already？ What if I find them in
my room？〃
But here was his room。 Nothing and no one in it。 No one had peeped
in。 Even Nastasya had not touched it。 But heavens！ how could he have
left all those things in the hole？
He rushed to the corner； slipped his hand under the paper； pulled
the things out and lined his pockets with them。 There were eight
articles in all： two little boxes with ear…rings or something of the
sort； he hardly looked to see； then four small leather cases。 There
was a chain； too； merely wrapped in newspaper and something else in
newspaper； that looked like a decoration。。。。 He put them all in the
different pockets of his overcoat； and the remaining pocket of his
trousers； trying to conceal them as much as possible。 He took the
purse； too。 Then he went out of his room； leaving the door open。 He
walked quickly and resolutely； and though he felt shattered； he had
his senses about him。 He was afraid of pursuit； he was afraid that
in another half…hour； another quarter of an hour perhaps； instructions
would be issued for his pursuit； and so at all costs； he must hide all
traces before then。 He must clear everything up while he still had
some strength； some reasoning power left him。。。。 Where was he to go？
That had long been settled： 〃Fling them into the canal； and all
traces hidden in the water； the thing would be at an end。〃 So he had
decided in the night of his delirium when several times he had had the
impulse to get up and go away； to make haste； and get rid of it all。
But to get rid of it； turned out to be a very difficult task。 He
wandered along the bank of the Ekaterininsky Canal for half an hour or
more and looked several times at the steps running down to the
water； but he could not think of carrying out his plan； either rafts
stood at the steps' edge； and women were washing clothes on them； or
boats were moored there； and people were swarming everywhere。 Moreover
he could be seen and noticed from the banks on all sides； it would
look suspicious for a man to go down on purpose； stop； and throw
something into the water。 And what if the boxes were to float
instead of sinking？ And of course they would。 Even as it was； every
one he met seemed to stare and look round； as if they had nothing to
do but to watch him。 〃Why is it； or can it be my fancy？〃 he thought。
At last the thought struck him that it might be better to go to
the Neva。 There were not so many people there； he would be less
observed； and it would be more convenient in every way； above all it
was further off。 He wondered how he could have been wandering for a
good half…hour； worried and anxious in this dangerous part without
thinking of it before。 And that half…hour he had lost over an
irrational plan； simply because he had thought of it in delirium！ He
had become extremely absent and forgetful and he was aware of it。 He
certainly must make haste。
He walked towards the Neva along V___ Prospect； but on the way
another idea struck him。 〃Why to the Neva？ Would it not be better to
go somewhere far off； to the Islands again； and there hide the
things in some solitary place； in a wood or under a bush； and mark the
spot perhaps？〃 And though he felt incapable of clear judgment； the
idea seemed to him a sound one。 But he was not destined to go there。
For coming out of V___ Prospect towards the square； he saw on the left
a passage leading between two blank walls to a courtyard。 On the right
hand； the blank unwhitewashed wall of a four…storied house stretched
far into the court； on the left； a wooden hoarding ran parallel with
it for twenty paces into the court； and then turned sharply to the
left。 Here was a deserted fenced…off place where rubbish of
different sorts was lying。 At the end of the court； the corner of a
low； smutty； stone shed； apparently part of some workshop； peeped from
behind the hoarding。 It was probably a carriage builder's or
carpenter's shed； the whole place from the entrance was black with
coal dust。 Here would be the place to throw it； he thought。 Not seeing
any one in the yard； h
