crime and punishment(罪与罚)-第83章
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business； with that careful and over…serious attention which is at
once oppressive and embarrassing； especially to a stranger； and
especially if what you are discussing is in your opinion of far too
little importance for such exceptional solemnity。 But in brief and
coherent phrases Raskolnikov explained his business clearly and
exactly； and was so well satisfied with himself that he even succeeded
in taking a good look at Porfiry。 Porfiry Petrovitch did not once take
his eyes off him。 Razumihin； sitting opposite at the same table；
listened warmly and impatiently； looking from one to the other every
moment with rather excessive interest。
〃Fool；〃 Raskolnikov swore to himself。
〃You have to give information to the police；〃 Porfiry replied；
with a most businesslike air； 〃that having learnt of this incident；
that is of the murder； you beg to inform the lawyer in charge of the
case that such and such things belong to you； and that you desire to
redeem them。。。 or。。。 but they will write to you。〃
〃That's just the point； that at the present moment；〃 Raskolnikov
tried his utmost to feign embarrassment； 〃I am not quite in funds。。。
and even this trifling sum is beyond me。。。 I only wanted； you see； for
the present to declare that the things are mine； and that when I
have money。。。。〃
〃That's no matter；〃 answered Porfiry Petrovitch； receiving his
explanation of his pecuniary position coldly； 〃but you can； if you
prefer； write straight to me； to say； that having been informed of the
matter； and claiming such and such as your property； you beg。。。〃
〃On an ordinary sheet of paper？〃 Raskolnikov interrupted eagerly；
again interested in the financial side of the question。
〃Oh； the most ordinary；〃 and suddenly Porfiry Petrovitch looked with
obvious irony at him； screwing up his eyes and as it were winking at
him。 But perhaps it was Raskolnikov's fancy； for it all lasted but a
moment。 There was certainly something of the sort； Raskolnikov could
have sworn he winked at him； goodness knows why。
〃He knows；〃 flashed through his mind like lightning。
〃Forgive my troubling you about such trifles；〃 he went on； a
little disconcerted； 〃the things are only worth five roubles； but I
prize them particularly for the sake of those from whom they came to
me； and I must confess that I was alarmed when I heard。。。〃
〃That's why you were so much struck when I mentioned to Zossimov
that Porfiry was inquiring for every one who had pledges！〃 Razumihin
put in with obvious intention。
This was really unbearable。 Raskolnikov could not help glancing at
him with a flash of vindictive anger in his black eyes； but
immediately recollected himself。
〃You seem to be jeering at me； brother？〃 he said to him； with a
well…feigned irritability。 〃I dare say I do seem to you absurdly
anxious about such trash； but you mustn't think me selfish or grasping
for that； and these two things may be anything but trash in my eyes。 I
told you just now that the silver watch； though it's not worth a cent；
is the only thing left us of my father's。 You may laugh at me； but
my mother is here；〃 he turned suddenly to Porfiry； 〃and if she
knew；〃 he turned again hurriedly to Razumihin； carefully making his
voice tremble； 〃that the watch was lost； she would be in despair！
You know what women are！〃
〃Not a bit of it！ I didn't mean that at all！ Quite the contrary！〃
shouted Razumihin distressed。
〃Was it right？ Was it natural？ Did I overdo it？〃 Raskolnikov asked
himself in a tremor。 〃Why did I say that about women？〃
〃Oh； your mother is with you？〃 Porfiry Petrovitch inquired。
〃Yes。〃
〃When did she come？〃
〃Last night。〃
Porfiry paused as though reflecting。
〃Your things would not in any case be lost；〃 he went on calmly and
coldly。 〃I have been expecting you here for some time。〃
And as though that was a matter of no importance； he carefully
offered the ash…tray to Razumihin； who was ruthlessly scattering
cigarette ash over the carpet。 Raskolnikov shuddered； but Porfiry
did not seem to be looking at him； and was still concerned with
Razumihin's cigarette。
〃What？ Expecting him？ Why； did you know that he had pledges
there？〃 cried Razumihin。
Porfiry Petrovitch addressed himself to Raskolnikov。
〃Your things； the ring and the watch； were wrapped up together；
and on the paper your name was legibly written in pencil； together
with the date on which you left them with her。。。〃
〃How observant you are！〃 Raskolnikov smiled awkwardly； doing his
very utmost to look him straight in the face； but he failed； and
suddenly added：
〃I say that because I suppose there were a great many pledges。。。
that it must be difficult to remember them all。。。。 But you remember
them all so clearly； and。。。 and。。。〃
〃Stupid！ Feeble！〃 he thought。 〃Why did I add that？〃
〃But we know all who had pledges； and you are the only one who
hasn't come forward；〃 Porfiry answered with hardly perceptible irony。
〃I haven't been quite well。〃
〃I heard that too。 I heard； indeed； that you were in great
distress about something。 You look pale still。〃
〃I am not pale at all。。。。 No； I am quite well；〃 Raskolnikov
snapped out rudely and angrily； completely changing his tone。 His
anger was mounting； he could not repress it。 〃And in my anger I
shall betray myself；〃 flashed through his mind again。 〃Why are they
torturing me？〃
〃Not quite well！〃 Razumihin caught him up。 〃What next！ He was
unconscious and delirious all yesterday。 Would you believe； Porfiry；
as soon as our backs were turned； he dressed； though he could hardly
stand； and gave us the slip and went off on a spree somewhere till
midnight； delirious all the time！ Would you believe it！
Extraordinary！〃
〃Really delirious？ You don't say so！〃 Porfiry shook his head in a
womanish way。
〃Nonsense！ Don't you believe it！ But you don't believe it anyway；〃
Raskolnikov let slip in his anger。 But Porfiry Petrovitch did not seem
to catch those strange words。
〃But how could you have gone out if you hadn't been delirious？〃
Razumihin got hot suddenly。 〃What did you go out for？ What was the
object of it？ And why on the sly？ Were you in your senses when you did
it？ Now that all danger
