the legacy of cain-第43章
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CHAPTER XXXVI。
THE WANDERING MIND。
FOR the moment； the Minister disappointed me。
Without speaking； without even looking up； he took out his
pocketbook； and began to write in it。 Constantly interrupted
either by a trembling in the hand that held the pencil； or by a
difficulty （as I imagined） in expressing thoughts imperfectly
realizedhis patience gave way； he dashed the book on the floor。
〃My mind is gone！〃 he burst out。 〃Oh； Father in Heaven； let death
deliver me from a body without a mind！〃
Who could hear him； and be guilty of the cruelty of preaching
self…control？ I picked up the pocketbook； and offered to help
him。
〃Do you think you can？〃 he asked。
〃I can at least try。〃
〃Good fellow！ What should I do without you？ See now； here is my
difficulty。 I have got so many things to say； I want to separate
themor else they will all run into each other。 Look at the
book；〃 my poor friend said mournfully； 〃they have run into each
other in spite of me。〃
The entries proved to be nearly incomprehensible。 Here and there
I discovered some scattered words； which showed themselves more
or less distinctly in the midst of the surrounding confusion。 The
first word that I could make out was 〃Education。〃 Helped by that
hint； I trusted to guess…work to guide me in speaking to him。 It
was necessary to be positive； or he would have lost all faith in
me。
〃Well？〃 he said impatiently。
〃Well；〃 I answered； 〃you have something to say to me about the
education which you have given to your daughters。〃
〃Don't put them together！〃 he cried。 〃Dear； patient； sweet Eunice
must not be confounded with that she…devil〃
〃Hush； hush； Mr。 Gracedieu！ Badly as Miss Helena has behaved； she
is your own child。〃
〃I repudiate her； sir！ Think for a moment of what she has
doneand then think of the religious education that I have given
her。 Heartless！ Deceitful！ The most ignorant creature in the
lowest dens of this town could have done nothing more basely
cruel。 And this； after years on years of patient Christian
instruction on my part！ What is religion？ What is education？ I
read a horrible book once （I forget who was the author）； it
called religion superstition； and education empty form。 I don't
know； upon my word I don't know that the book may notOh； my
tongue！ Why don't I keep a guard over my tongue？ Are you a
father； too？ Don't interrupt me。 Put yourself in my place； and
think of it。 Heartless； deceitful； and _my_ daughter。 Give me the
pocketbook； I want to see which memorandum comes first。〃
He had now wrought himself into a state of excitement； which
relieved his spirits of the depression that had weighed on them
up to this time。 His harmless vanity； always； as I suspect； a
latent quality in his kindly nature； had already restored his
confidence。 With a self…sufficient smile he consulted his own
unintelligible entries； and made his own wild discoveries。
〃Ah； yes； 'M' stands for Minister； I come first。 Am I to blame？
Am IGod forgive me my many sinsam I heartless？ Am I
deceitful？〃
〃My good friend； not even your enemies could say that！〃
〃Thank you。 Who comes next？〃 He consulted the book again。 〃Her
mother； her sainted mother； comes next。 People say she is like
her mother。 Was my wife heartless？ Was the angel of my life
deceitful？〃
（〃That；〃 I thought to myself； 〃is exactly what your wife wasand
exactly what reappears in your wife's child。〃）
〃Where does her wickedness come from？〃 he went on。 〃Not from her
mother； not from me； not from a neglected education。〃 He suddenly
stepped up to me and laid his hands on my shoulders； his voice
dropped to hoarse； moaning； awestruck tones。 〃Shall I tell you
what it is？ A possession of the devil。〃
It was so evidently desirable to prevent any continuation of such
a train of thought as this； that I could feel no hesitation in
interrupting him。
〃Will you hear what I have to say？〃 I asked bluntly。
His humor changed again； he made me a low bow； and went back to
his chair。 〃I will hear you with pleasure；〃 he answered politely。
〃You are the most eloquent man I know； with one
exceptionmyself。 Of coursemyself。〃
〃It is mere waste of time；〃 I continued； 〃to regret the excellent
education which your daughter has misused。〃 Making that reply； I
was tempted to add another word of truth。 All education is at the
mercy of two powerful counter…influences： the influence of
temperament； and the influence of circumstances。 But this was
philosophy。 How could I expect him to submit to philosophy？ 〃What
we know of Miss Helena；〃 I went on； 〃must be enough for us。 She
has plotted； and she means to succeed。 Stop her。〃
〃Just my idea！〃 he declared firmly。 〃I refuse my consent to that
abominable marriage。〃
In the popular phrase； I struck while the iron was hot。 〃You must
do more than that； sir；〃 I told him。
His vanity suddenly took the alarmI was leading him rather too
undisguisedly。 He handed his book back to me。 〃You will find；〃 he
said loftily； 〃that I have put it all down there。〃
I pretended to find it； and read an imaginary entry to this
effect： 〃After what she has already done； Helena is capable of
marrying in defiance of my wishes and commands。 This must be
considered and provided against。〃 So far； I had succeeded in
flattering him。 But when （thinking of his paternal authority） I
alluded next to his daughter's age； his eyes rested on me with a
look of downright terror。
〃No more of that！〃 he said。 〃I won't talk of the girls' ages even
with you。〃
What did he mean？ It was useless to ask。 I went on with the
matter in handstill deliberately speaking to him； as I might
have spoken to a man with an intellect as clear as my own。 In my
experience； this practice generally stimulates a weak
intelligence to do its best。 We all know how children receive
talk that is lowered； or books that are lowered； to their
presumed level。
〃I shall take it for granted；〃 I continued； 〃that Miss Helena is
still under your lawful authority。 She can only arrive at her
ends by means of a runaway marriage。 In that case； much depends
on the man。 You told me you couldn't help liking him。 This was；
of course； before you knew of the infamous manner in which he has
behaved。 You must have changed your opinion now。〃
He seemed to be at a loss how to reply。 〃I am afraid；〃 he said；
〃the young man was drawn into it by Helena。〃
Here was Miss Jillgall's apology for Philip Dunboyne repeated in
other words。 Despising and detesting the fellow as I did； I was
forced to admit to myself that he must be recommended by personal
attractions which it would be necessary to reckon with。 I tried
to get s ome more information from Mr。 Gracedieu。
〃The excuse you have just made for him；〃 I resumed； 〃implies that
he is a weak man； easily persuaded； easily led。〃
The Minister answered by nodding his head。
〃Such weakness as that；〃 I persisted； 〃is a vice in itself。 It
has led already； sir； to the saddest results。〃
He admitted this by another nod。
〃I don't wish to shock you； Mr。 Gracedieu； but I must recommend
employing the means that present themselves。 You must practice on
this man's weakness； for the sake of the good that may come of
it。 I hear he is in London with his father。 Try the strong
influence； and write to his father。 There is another reason
besides for doing this。 It is quite possible that the truth has
been concealed from Mr。 Dunboyne the elder。 Take care that he is
informed of what has really happened。 Are you looking for pen；
ink； and paper？ Let me offer you the writing materials which I
use in traveling。〃
I placed them before him。 He took up the pen； he arranged the
paper； he was eager to begin。
After writing a few words； he stoppedreflectedtried
againstopped againtore up the little that he had doneand
began a new letter； ending in the same miserable result。 It was
impossible to witness his helplessness； to see how pitiably
patient he was over his own incapacity； and to let the melancholy
spectacle go on。 I proposed to write the letter； authenticating
it； of course； by his signature。 When he allowed me to take the
pen； he turned away his face； ashamed to let me see what he
suffered。 Was this the same
