the professor(縮娩)-及66嫗
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!!!!隆堋響頼��紗秘慕禰厮宴和肝写偬堋響��
observing�察 �not on entertaining�察 �looking frigidly shy at the
commencement of a party�察�confusingly vigilant about the middle�察�
and insultingly weary towards the end。 Is that the way�察 �do you
think�察�ever to communicate pleasure or excite interest�拭�No�察�and if
you are generally unpopular�察�it is because you deserve to be so。 ̄
^Content� 院�I ejaculated。
^No�察 �you are not content�察 �you see beauty always turning its
back on you�察�you are mortified and then you sneer。 I verily believe
all that is desirable on earth!wealth�察 �reputation�察 �love!will for
ever to you be the ripe grapes on the high trellis�此�you¨ll look up at
them�察�they will tantalize in you the lust of the eye�察�but they are out
of reach�此�you have not the address to fetch a ladder�察�and you¨ll go
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away calling them sour。 ̄
Cutting as these words might have been under some
circumstances�察�they drew no blood now。 My life was changed�察�my
experience had been varied since I left X!�察 �but Hunsden could
not know this�察 �he had seen me only in the character of Mr。
Crimsworth¨s clerk!a dependant amongst wealthy strangers�察�
meeting disdain with a hard front�察 �conscious of an unsocial and
unattractive exterior�察 �refusing to sue for notice which I was sure
would be withheld�察 �declining to evince an admiration which I
knew would be scorned as worthless。 He could not be aware that
since then youth and loveliness had been to me everyday objects�察�
that I had studied them at leisure and closely�察 �and had seen the
plain texture of truth under the embroidery of appearance�察 �nor
could he�察�keen´sighted as he was�察�penetrate into my heart�察�search
my brain�察 �and read my peculiar sympathies and antipathies�察 �he
had not known me long enough�察�or well enough�察�to perceive how
low my feelings would ebb under some influences�察�powerful over
most minds�察 �how high�察 �how fast they would flow under other
influences�察�that perhaps acted with the more intense force on me�察�
because they acted on me alone。 Neither could he suspect for an
instant the history of my communications with Mdlle Reuter�察�
secret to him and to all others was the tale of her strange
infatuation�察 �her blandishments�察 �her wiles had been seen but by
me�察�and to me only were they known�察�but they had changed me�察�
for they had proved that I could impress。 A sweeter secret nestled
deeper in my heart�察�one full of tenderness and as full of strength�此�it
took the sting out of Hunsden¨s sarcasm�察 �it kept me unbent by
shame�察 �and unstirred by wrath。 But of all this I could say
nothing!nothing decisive at least�察�uncertainty sealed my lips�察�and
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during the interval of silence by which alone I replied to Mr。
Hunsden�察 �I made up my mind to be for the present wholly
misjudged by him�察�and misjudged I was�察�he thought he had been
rather too hard upon me�察�and that I was crushed by the weight of
his upbraidings�察 �so to reassure me he said�察 �doubtless I should
mend some day�察�I was only at the beginning of life yet�察�and since
happily I was not quite without sense�察 �every false step I made
would be a good lesson。
Just then I turned my face a little to the light�察�the approach of
twilight�察�and my position in the window´seat�察�had�察�for the last ten
minutes�察 �prevented him from studying my countenance�察 �as I
moved�察 �however�察 �he caught an expression which he thus
interpreted�此�
^Confound it� �How doggedly self´approving the lad looks� �I
thought he was fit to die with shame�察 �and there he sits grinning
smiles�察 �as good as to say�察 �Let the world wag as it will�察 �I¨ve the
philosopher¨s stone in my waist´coat pocket�察�and the elixir of life in
my cupboard�察�I¨m independent of both Fate and Fortune。¨ ̄
^Hunsden!you spoke of grapes�察�I was thinking of a fruit I like
better than your X! hot´house grapes!an unique fruit�察�growing
wild�察�which I have marked as my own�察�and hope one day to gather
and taste。 It is of no use your offering me the draught of bitterness�察�
or threatening me with death by thirst�此�I have the anticipation of
sweetness on my palate�察 �the hope of freshness on my lips�察 �I can
reject the unsavoury�察�and endure the exhausting。 ̄
^For how long�拭院�
^Till the next opportunity for effort�察�and as the prize of success
will be a treasure after my own heart�察�I¨ll bring a bull¨s strength to
the struggle。 ̄
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^Bad luck crushes bulls as easily as bullaces�察�and�察�I believe�察�the
fury dogs you�此�you were born with a wooden spoon in your mouth�察�
depend on it。 ̄
^I believe you�察 �sad I mean to make my wooden spoon do the
work of some people¨s silver ladles�此 �grasped firmly�察 �and handled
nimbly�察�even a wooden spoon will shovel up broth。 ̄
Hunsden rose�此 �I see�察院�said he�察 �I suppose you¨re one of those
who develop best unwatched�察�and act best unaided´work your own
way。 Now�察�I¨ll go。 ̄ And�察�without another word�察�he was going�察�at the
door he turned�此�
^Crimsworth Hall is sold�察院�said he。
^Sold� 院�was my echo。
^Yes�察 �you know�察 �of course�察 �that your brother failed three
months ago�拭院�
^What� �Edward Crimsworth�拭院�
^Precisely�察�and his wife went home to her fathers�察�when affairs
went awry�察 �his temper sympathized with them�察 �he used her ill�察 �I
told you he would be a tyrant to her some day�察�as to him! ̄
^Ay�察�as to him!what is become of him�拭院�
^Nothing extraordinary!don¨t be alarmed�察 �he put himself
under the protection of the court�察�compounded with his creditors
!tenpence in the pound�察�in six weeks set up again�察 �coaxed back
his wife�察�and is flourishing like a green bay´tree。 ̄
^And Crimsworth Hall!was the furniture sold too�拭院�
^Everything!from the grand piano down to the rolling´pin。 ̄
^And the contents of the oak dining´room!were they sold�拭院�
^Of course�察 �why should the sofas and chairs of that room be
held more sacred than those of any other�拭院�
^And the pictures�拭院�
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^What pictures�拭 �Crimsworth had no special collection that I
know of!he did not profess to be an amateur。 ̄
^There were two portraits�察 �one on each side the mantelpiece�察�
you cannot have forgotten them�察 �Mr。 Hunsden�察 �you once noticed
that of the lady! ̄
^Oh�察�I know� �the thin´faced gentlewoman with a shawl put on
like drapery。!Why�察�as a matter of course�察�it would be sold a