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THE MIRROR OF KONG HO
THE MIRROR OF
KONG HO
BY ERNEST BRAMAH
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THE MIRROR OF KONG HO
A lively and amusing collection of letters on western living written by
Kong Ho�察�a Chinese gentleman。 These addressed to his homeland�察�refer to
the Westerners in London as barbarians and many of the aids to life in our
society give Kong Ho endless food for thought。 These are things such as
the motor car and the piano�察�unknown in China at this time。
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THE MIRROR OF KONG HO
INTRODUCTION
ESTIMABLE BARBARIAN��Your opportune suggestion that I
should permit the letters�察 �wherein I have described with undeviating
fidelity the customs and manner of behaving of your accomplished race�察�to
be set forth in the form of printed leaves for all to behold�察 �is doubtless
gracefully´intentioned�察 �and this person will raise no barrier of dissent
against it。
In this he is inspired by the benevolent hope that his immature
compositions may to one extent become a model and a by´word to those
who in turn visit his own land of Fragrant Purity�察�for with exacting care he
has set down no detail that has not come under his direct observation
��although it is not to be denied that here or there he may�察�perchance�察�have
misunderstood an involved allusion or failed to grasp the inner
significance of an act���察 �so that Impartiality necessarily sways his brush�察�
and Truth lurks within his inkpot。
In an entirely contrary manner some�察 �who of recent years have
gratified us with their magnanimous presence�察�have returned to their own
countries not only with the internal fittings of many of our palaces ��which�察�
being for the most part of a replaceable nature�察 �need be only trivially
referred to�察�the incident�察�indeed�察�being generally regarded as a most cordial
and pressing variety of foreign politeness���察�but alsoin the lack of highly´
spiced actualitywith subtly´imagined and truly objectionable instances。
These calumnies they have not hesitated to commit to the form of printed
books�察�which�察�falling into the hands of the ignorant and undiscriminating�察�
may even suggest to their ill´balanced minds a doubt whether we of the
Celestial Empire really are the wisest�察 �bravest�察 �purest�察 �and most
enlightened people in existence。
As a parting�察 �it only remains to be said that�察 �in order to maintain
unimpaired the quaint´sounding brevity and archaic construction of your
prepossessing language�察 �I have engraved most of the remarks upon the
receptive tablets of my mind as they were uttered。 To one who can repeat
the Five Classics without stumbling this is a contemptible achievement。
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THE MIRROR OF KONG HO
Let it be an imposed obligation�察�therefore�察�that you retain these portions
unchanged as a test and a proof to all who may read。 Of my own deficient
words�察�I can only in truest courtesy maintain that any alteration must of
necessity make them less offensively commonplace than at present they
are。
The Sign and immutable Thumb´mark of�察�Kong Ho
By a sure hand to the House of one Ernest Bramah。
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THE MIRROR OF KONG HO
LETTER I
Concerning the journey。 The unlawful demons invoked by certain of
the barbarians�察 �their power and the manner of their suppression。
suppression。 The incredible obtuseness of those who attend within tea´
houses。 The harmonious attitude of a person of commerce。
VENERATED SIRE ��at whose virtuous and well´established feet an
unworthy son now prostrates himself in spirit repeatedly���察�
Having at length reached the summit of my journey�察 �that London of
which the merchants from Canton spoke so many strange and incredible
things�察 �I now send you filial salutations three times increased�察 �and in
accordance with your explicit command I shall write all things to you with
an unvarnished brush�察 �well assured that your versatile object in
committing me to so questionable an enterprise was�察�above all�察�to learn the
truth of these matters in an undeviating and yet open´headed spirit of
accuracy and toleration。
Of the perils incurred while travelling in the awe´inspiring devices by
which I was transferred from shore to shore and yet further inland�察�of the
utter absence of all leisurely dignity on the part of those controlling their
movements�察 �and of the almost unnatural self´opinionatedness which led
them to persist in starting at a stated and prearranged time�察�even when this
person had courteously pointed out to them by irrefutable omens that
neither the day nor the hour was suitable for the venture�察�I have already
written。 It is enough to assert that a similar want of prudence was
maintained on every occasion�察�and�察�as a result�察�when actually within sight
of the walls of this city�察�we were involved for upwards of an hour in a very
evilly´arranged yellow darkness�察�which�察�had we but delayed for a day�察�as I
strenuously advised those in authority after consulting the Sacred Flat and
Round Sticks�察�we should certainly have avoided。
Concerning the real nature of the devices by which the ships are
propelled at sea and the carriages on land�察�I must still unroll a blank mind
until I can secretly�察�and without undue hazard�察�examine them more closely。
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If�察�as you maintain�察�it is the work of captive demons hidden away among
their most inside parts�察�it must be admitted that these usually intractable
beings are admirably trained and controlled�察�and I am wide´headed enough
to think that in this respect we mightnot´withstanding our nine thousand
years of civilised refinementlearn something of the methods of these
barbarians。 The secret�察�however�察 �is jealously guarded�察 �and they deny the
existence of any supernatural forces�察�but their protests may be ignored�察�for
there is undoubtedly a powerful demon used in a similar way by some of
the boldest of them�察�although its employment is unlawful。 A certain kind
of chariot is used for the occupation of this demon�察�and those who wish to
invoke it conceal their faces within masks of terrifying design�察�and cover
their hands and bodies with specially prepared garments�察�without which it
would be fatal to encounter these very powerful spirits。 While yet among
the habitations of men�察�and in crowded places�察�they are constrained to use
less powerful demons�察 �which are lawful�察 �but when they reach the
unfrequented paths they throw aside all restraint�察�and�察�calling to their aid
the forbidden spirit ��which they do by secret movements of the hands���察�
they are carried forward by its agency at a speed unattainable by merely
human means。 By day the demon looks forth from three white eyes�察�which
at night have a penetrating brilliance equal t