the ragged trousered philanthropists-第158章

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　　Then　the　Tories　went　back　to　the　Fountain　carrying　the　captured　torches；　and　singing　to　the　tune　of　‘Has　anyone　seen　a　German　Band？'

　　　　　　　　‘Has　anyone　seen　a　Lib'ral　Flag；　　　　　　　　　Lib'ral　Flag；　Lib'ral　Flag？'

While　the　Tories　resumed　their　meeting　at　the　Fountain；　the　Liberals　rallied　in　one　of　the　back　streets。　　Messengers　were　sent　in　various　directions　for　reinforcements；　and　about　half　an　hour　afterwards　they　emerged　from　their　retreat　and　swooped　down　upon　the　Tory　meeting。　They　overturned　the　platform；　recaptured　their　torches；　tore　the　enemy's　banner　to　tatters　and　drove　them　from　their　position。　　Then　the　Liberals　in　their　turn　paraded　the　streets　singing　‘Has　anyone　seen　a　Tory　Flag？'　and　proceeded　to　the　hall　where　Sir　Featherstone　was　speaking；　arriving　as　the　audience　left。

The　crowd　that　came　pouring　out　of　the　hall　was　worked　up　to　a　frenzy　of　enthusiasm；　for　the　speech　they　had　just　listened　to　had　been　a　sort　of　manifesto　to　the　country。

In　response　to　the　cheering　of　the　processionists　…　who；　of　course；　had　not　heard　the　speech；　but　were　cheering　from　force　of　habit　…　Sir　Featherstone　Blood　stood　up　in　the　carriage　and　addressed　the　crowd；　briefly　outlining　the　great　measures　of　Social　Reform　that　his　party　proposed　to　enact　to　improve　the　condition　of　the　working　classes；　and　as　they　listened；　the　Wise　Men　grew　delirious　with　enthusiasm。　　He　referred　to　Land　Taxes　and　Death　Duties　which　would　provide　money　to　build　battleships　to　protect　the　property　of　the　rich；　and　provide　Work　for　the　poor。　　Another　tax　was　to　provide　a　nice；　smooth　road　for　the　rich　to　ride　upon　in　motor　cars　…　and　to　provide　Work　for　the　poor。　　Another　tax　would　be　used　for　Development；　which　would　also　make　Work　for　the　poor。　　And　so　on。　　A　great　point　was　made　of　the　fact　that　the　rich　were　actually　to　be　made　to　pay　something　towards　the　cost　of　their　road　themselves！　　But　nothing　was　said　about　how　they　would　get　the　money　to　do　it。　　No　reference　was　made　to　how　the　workers　would　be　sweated　and　driven　and　starved　to　earn　Dividends　and　Rent　and　Interest　and　Profits　to　put　into　the　pockets　of　the　rich　before　the　latter　would　be　able　to　pay　for　anything　at　all。

These　are　the　things；　Gentlemen；　that　we　propose　to　do　for　you；　and；　at　the　rate　of　progress　which　we　propose　to　adopt；　I　say　without　fear　or　contradiction；　that　within　the　next　Five　Hundred　years　we　shall　so　reform　social　conditions　in　this　country；　that　the　working　classes　will　be　able　to　enjoy　some　of　the　benefits　of　civilization。

‘The　only　question　before　you　is：　Are　you　willing　to　wait　for　Five　Hundred　Years？'

‘Yes；　sir；'　shouted　the　Wise　Men　with　enthusiasm　at　the　glorious　prospect。

‘Yes；　Sir：　we'll　wait　a　thousand　years　if　you　like；　Sir！'

‘I've　been　waiting　all　my　life；'　said　one　poor　old　veteran；　who　had　assisted　to　‘carry　the　〃Old　Flag〃　to　victory'　times　out　of　number　in　the　past　and　who　for　his　share　of　the　spoils　of　those　victories　was　now　in　a　condition　of　abject；　miserable　poverty；　with　the　portals　of　the　workhouse　yawning　open　to　receive　him；　‘I've　waited　all　my　life；　hoping　and　trusting　for　better　conditions　so　a　few　more　years　won't　make　much　difference　to　me。'

‘Don't　you　trouble　to　'urry　yourself；　Sir；'　shouted　another　Solomon　in　the　crowd。　　‘We　don't　mind　waiting。　　Take　your　own　time；　Sir。　　You　know　better　than　the　likes　of　us　'ow　long　it　ought　to　take。'

In　conclusion；　the　great　man　warned　them　against　being　led　away　by　the　Socialists；　those　foolish；　unreasonable；　impractical　people　who　wanted　to　see　an　immediate　improvement　in　their　condition；　and　he　reminded　them　that　Rome　was　not　built　in　a　day。

The　Wise　Men　applauded　lustily。　　It　did　not　appear　to　occur　to　any　of　them　that　the　rate　at　which　the　ancient　Roman　conducted　their　building　operations　had　nothing　whatever　to　do　with　the　case。

Sir　Featherstone　Blood　sat　down　amid　a　wild　storm　of　cheering；　and　then　the　procession　reformed；　and；　reinforced　by　the　audience　from　the　hall；　they　proceeded　to　march　about　the　dreary　streets；　singing；　to　the　tune　of　the　‘Men　of　Harlech'：

　　　　　　　　‘Vote　for　Sweater；　Vote　for　Sweater！　　　　　　　　　Vote　for　Sweater；　VOTE　FOR　SWEATER！　　　　　　　　　‘He's　the　Man；　who　has　a　plan；　　　　　　　　　To　liberate　and　reinstate　the　workers！　　　　　　　　　‘Men　of　Mugs'bro'；　show　your　mettle；　　　　　　　　　Let　them　see　that　you're　in　fettle！　　　　　　　　　Once　for　all　this　question　settle　　　　　　　　　Sweater　shall　Prevail！'

The　carriage　containing　Sir　Featherstone；　Adam　Sweater；　and　Rushton　and　Didlum　was　in　the　middle　of　the　procession。　　The　banner　and　the　torches　were　at　the　head；　and　the　grandeur　of　the　scene　was　heightened　by　four　men　who　walked　…　two　on　each　side　of　the　carriage；　burning　green　fire　in　frying　pans。　　As　they　passed　by　the　Slave　Market；　a　poor；　shabbily　dressed　wretch　whose　boots　were　so　worn　and　rotten　that　they　were　almost　falling　off　his　feet；　climbed　up　a　lamp…post；　and　taking　off　his　cap　waved　it　in　the　air　and　shrieked　out：　‘Three　Cheers　for　Sir　Featherstone　Blood；　our　future　Prime　Minister！'

The　Philanthropists　cheered　themselves　hoarse　and　finally　took　the　horses　out　of　the　traces　and　harnessed　themselves　to　the　carriage　instead。

‘'Ow　much　wages　will　Sir　Featherstone　get　if　'e　is　made　Prime　Minister？'　asked　Harlow　of　another　Philanthropist　who　was　also　pushing　up　behind　the　carriage。

‘Five　thousand　a　year；'　replied　the　other；　who　by　some　strange　chance　happened　to　know。　　‘That　comes　to　a　'underd　pounds　a　week。'

‘Little　enough；　too；　for　a　man　like　'im；'　said　Harlow。

‘You're　right；　mate；'　said　the　other；　with　deep　sympathy　in　his　voice。　‘Last　time　'e　'eld　office　'e　was　only　in　for　five　years；　so　'e　only　made　twenty…five　thousand　pounds　out　of　it。　　Of　course　'e　got　a　pension　as　well　…　two　thousand　a　year　for　life；　I　think　it　is；　but　after　all；　what's　that　…　for　a　man　like　'im？'

‘Nothing；'　replied　Harlow；　in　a　tone　of　commiseration；　and　Newman；　who　was　also　there；　helping　to　drag　the　carriage；　said　that　it　ought　to　be　at　least　double　that　amount。

However；　they　found　some　consolation　in　knowing　that　Sir　Featherstone　would　not　have　to　wait　till　he　was　seventy　before　he　obtained　his　pension；　he　would　get　it　directly　he　came　out　of　office。



The　following　evening　Barrington；　Owen　and　a　few　others　of　the　same　way　of　thinking；　who　had　subscribed　enough　money　between　them　to　purchase　a　lot　of　Socialist　leaflets；　employed　themselves　distributing　them　to　the　crowds　at　the　Liberal　and　Tory　meetings；　and　whilst　they　were　doing　this　they　frequently　became　involved　in　arguments　with　the　supporters　of　the　capitalist　system。　　In　their　attempts　to　persuade　others　to　refrain　from　voting　for　either　of　the　candidates；　they　were　opposed　even　by　some　who　professed　to　believe　in　Socialism；　who　said　that　as　there　was　no　better　Socialist　candidate　the　thing　to　do　was　to　vote　for　the　better　of　the　two。　　This　was　the　view　of　Harlow　and　Easton；　whom　they　met。　　Harlow　had　a　green　ribbon　in　his　buttonhole；　but　Easton　wore　D'Encloseland's　colours。

One　man　said　that　if　he　had　his　way；　all　those　who　had　votes　should　be　compelled　to　record　them　…　whether　they　liked　it　or　not　…　or　be　disenfranchised！　　Barrington　asked　him　if　he　believed　in　Tarrif　Reform。　　The　man　said　no。

‘Why　not？'　demanded　Barrington。

The　other　replied　that　he　opposed　Tariff　Reform　because　he　believed　it　would　ruin　the　country。　　Barrington　inquired　if　he　were　a　supporter　of　Socialism。　　The　man　said　he　was　not；　and　when　further　questioned　he　said　that　he　believed　if　it　were　ever　adopted　it　would　bring　black　ruin　upon　the　country　…　he　believed　this　because　Mr　Sweater　had　said　so。　When　Barrington　asked　him　…　supposing　there　were　only　two　candidates；　one　a　Socialist　and　the　other　a　Tariff　Reformer　…　how　would　he　like　to　be　compelled　to　vote　for　one　of　them；　he　was　at　a　loss　for　an　answer。

During　the　next　few　days　the　contest　continued。　　The　hired　orators　continued　to　pour　forth　their　streams　of　eloquence；　and　tons　of　literature　flooded　the　town。　　The　walls　were　covered　with　huge　posters：　‘Another　Liberal　Lie。'　‘Another　Tory　Fraud。'

Unconsciously　each　of　these　two　parties　put　in　some　splendid　work　for　Socialism；　in　so　much　that　each　of　them　thoroughly　exposed　the　hypocrisy　of　the　other。　　If　the　pe