the crime of sylvestre bonnard(西维斯特·博拉德的罪行)-第58章
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did not make his proposal to me in person。 He got one of his professors； an
old colleague of mine； highly esteemed for his learning and character； to
come to me on his behalf。 But what a love messenger！ Great Heavens！ A
bearneat a bear of the Pyrenees； but a literary bear； and this latter variety
of bear is much more ferocious than the former。
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〃Right or wrong （in my opinion wrong） Gelis says that he does not
want any dowry； he takes your ward with nothing but her chemise。 Say
yes； and the thing is settled！ Make haste about it！ I want to show you two
or three very curious old tokens from Lorraine which I am sure you never
saw before。〃
That is literally what he said to me。 I answered him that I would
consult Jeanne； and I found no small pleasure in telling him that my ward
had a dowry。
Her dowrythere it is in front of me！ It is my library。 Henri and Jeanne
have not even the faintest suspicion about it； and the fact is I am
commonly believed to be much richer than I am。 I have the face of an old
miser。 It is certainly a lying face； but its untruthfulness has often won for
me a great deal of consideration。 There is nobody so much respected in
this world as a stingy rich man。
I have consulted Jeanne；but what was the need of listening for her
answer？ It is done！ They are betrothed。
It would ill become my character as well as my face to watch these
young people any longer for the mere purpose of noting down their words
and gestures。 Noli me tangere：that is the maxim for all charming love
affairs。 I know my duty。 It is to respect all the little secrets of that innocent
soul intrusted to me。 Let these children love each other all they can！ Never
a word of their fervent outpouring of mutual confidences； never a hint of
their artless self…betrayals； will be set down in this diary by the old
guardian whose authority was so gentle and so brief。 At all events； I am
not going to remain with my arms folded； and if they have their business
to attend to； I have mine also。 I am preparing a catalogue of my books；
with a view to having them all sold at auction。 It is a task which saddens
and amuses me at the same time。 I linger over it； perhaps a good deal
longer than I ought to do； turning the leaves of all those works which have
become so familiar to my thought； to my touch； to my sighteven out of
all necessity and reason。 But it is a farewell； and it has ever been in the
nature of man to prolong a farewell。
This ponderous volume here； which has served me so much for thirty
long years； how can I leave it without according it every kindness that a
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faithful servant deserves？ And this one again； which has so often consoled
me by its wholesome doctrines； must I not bow down before it for the last
time； as to a Master？ But each time that I meet with a volume which led
me into error； which ever afflicted me with false dates； omissions； lies； and
other plagues of the archaeologist； I say to it with bitter joy： 〃Go！ imposter；
traitor； false…witness！ flee thou far away from me for ever；vade retro！ all
absurdly covered with gold as thou art！ and I pray it may befall thee
thanks to thy usurped reputation and thy comely morocco attire to take
thy place in the cabinet of some banker…bibliomaniac； whom thou wilt
never be able to seduce as thou has seduced me； because he will never
read one single line of thee。〃
I laid aside some books I must always keepthose books which were
given to me as souvenirs。 As I placed among them the manuscript of the
〃Golden Legend；〃 I could not but kiss it in memory of Madame Trepof；
who remained grateful to me in spite of her high position and all her
wealth； and who became my benefactress merely to prove to me that she
felt I had once done her a kindness。。。。 Thus I had made a reserve。 It was
then that； for the first time； I felt myself inclined to commit a deliberate
crime。 All through that night I was strongly tempted； by morning the
temptation had become irresistible。 Everybody else in the house was still
asleep。 I got out of bed and stole softly from my room。
Ye powers of darkness！ ye phantoms of the night！ if while lingering
within my home after the crowing of the cock； you saw me stealing about
on tiptoe in the City of Books； you certainly never cried out； as Madame
Trepof did at Naples； 〃That old man has a good…natured round back！〃 I
entered the library； Hannibal； with his tail perpendicularly erected； came
to rub himself against my legs and purr。 I seized a volume from its shelf；
some venerable Gothic text or some noble poet of the Renaissancethe
jewel； the treasure which I had been dreaming about all night； I seized it
and slipped it away into the very bottom of the closet which I had reserved
for those books I intended to retain； and which soon became full almost to
bursting。 It is horrible to relate： I was stealing from the dowry of Jeanne！
And when the crime had been consummated I set myself again sturdily to
the task of cataloguing； until Jeanne came to consult me in regard to
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something about a dress or a trousseau。 I could not possibly understand
just what she was talking about； through my total ignorance of the current
vocabulary of dress…making and linen…drapery。 Ah！ if a bride of the
fourteenth century had come to talk to me about the apparel of her epoch；
then； indeed； I should have been able to understand her language！ But
Jeanne does not belong to my time； and I have to send her to Madame de
Gabry； who on this important occasion will take the place of her mother。
。。。Night has come！ Leaning from the window； we gaze at the vast
sombre stretch of the city below us； pierced with multitudinous points of
light。 Jeanne presses her hand to her forehead as she leans upon the
window…bar； and seems a little sad。 And I say to myself as I watch her： All
changes even the most longed for； have their melancholy； for what we
leave behind us is a part of ourselves： we must die to one life before we
can enter into another！
And as if answering my thought； the young girl murmurs to me；
〃My guardian； I am so happy； and still I feel as if I wanted to cry！〃
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The Last Page
August 21； 1869。
Page eighty…seven。。。。 Only twenty lines more and I shall have finished
my book about insects and flowers。 Page eighty…seventh and last。。。。 〃As
we have already seen； the visits of insects are of the utmost importance to
plants； since their duty is to carry to the pistils the pollen of the stamens。 It
seems also that the flower itself is arranged and made attractive for the
purpose of inviting this nuptial visit。 I think I have been able to show that
the nectary of the plant distils a su
