pathology of lying-第25章

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o　earn　her　own　living　and　soon　found　a　good　place。　　She　was　always　able　to　make　a　good　presentation　of　herself；　being　a　quiet　and　convincing　conversationalist。

Out　of　the　mess　of　lies　surrounding　her　New　York　experience；　it　was　finally　found　that　she　had　met　a　young　man　in　a　boarding…house　and　had　become　infatuated　with　him。　　He　was　an　honest　enough　fellow；　but　fell　in　readily　with　her　forwardness。　　He　took　her　to　shows；　and　letters；　intercepted　by　the　mother；　showed　that　between　them　there　had　been　some　premature　love　passages。　　At　that　time　Janet　started　making　weekly　payments　on　a　gold　watch　to　give　to　this　young　man　at　Christmas；　a　curious　and　quite　unwarranted　expenditure。　　Perhaps　this　was　the　fact　around　which　some　of　her　fabrications　at　that　time　centered。　　Perhaps　it　was　this　money　which　became　now　the　amount　she　was　paying　to　her　father's　pensioner；　now　what　she　had　to　send　home　to　her　mother；　and；　again；　her　payments　upon　an　imaginary　sewing　machine。　　In　this　affair；　as　at　other　times；　the　lying　was　extremely　childish；　inasmuch　as　the　truth；　through　receipts　found　in　her　room；　proved　to　be　readily　ascertainable。

A　good　example　of　the　character　of　Janet's　falsifications　was　the　story　about　the　death　of　her　lover；　told　to　us　at　our　last　interview　with　her　when　she　had　come　to　us　with　the　specific　purpose　of　trying　to　get　herself　straightened　out　once　and　for　all。　　She　was　not　aware　that　her　parents　had　given　me　any　account　of　this　young　man；　but　she　might　well　have　supposed　that　I　had　inquired　about　him；　or　at　least　would　inquire。　　Only　a　few　minutes　previously　she　had　told　about　her　lying　and　given　a　very　definite　account　of　its　beginnings　which　was　much　in　accord　with　what　her　parents　had　said。　　Mentioning　her　love　affairs；　she　maintained　that；　unbeknown　to　her　parents；　she　had　been　engaged　to　this　man；　but　that　he　had　proved　to　be　a　thief；　stealing　money　and　robbing　the　mails。　　She　started　off　on　a　story　of　how　another　young　man　was　accused；　but　no　evidence　was　forthcoming　about　him；　and　soon　afterward　her　lover　died。　　Getting　him　safely　buried　for　us；　she　was　quite　willing　to　go　on　to　another　topic。

The　workings　of　Janet's　mind　in　connection　with　her　alterations　of　a　story　were　sometimes　most　curious。　　We　were　interested　to　study　a　long　letter　quite　coherently　written　to　her　mother　a　few　days　before　we　saw　the　young　woman；　and　about　the　time　when　she　first　told　her　long　story　to　the　department　manager。　　In　the　letter　she　spoke　of　the　extraordinary　opportunities　she　now　had　in　this　place　of　employment；　exaggerating　her　salary　to　14　a　week。　　She　stated　she　had　already　had　a　raise；　and　could　get　work　for　other　members　of　her　family　at　good　salaries。　　She　was　about　to　start　a　bank　account；　and　so　on。　　But　instead　of　making　any　remittances　to　her　mother　（such　as　she　asserted　at　one　time）　she　requested　her　parents　to　send　her　5　to　tide　her　over。　　We　counted　no　less　than　nine　definite　falsehoods　in　this　epistle。　　We　were　keen　to　know　if　Janet　could　remember　her　own　prevarications　and　so　asked　her　if　she　could　recall　what　she　had　written　to　her　mother。　　She　trimmed　her　statements　most　curiously　then；　being　aware　we　knew　her　salary　to　be　8　a　week。　　She　said　she　had　told　her　mother　her　salary　was　10；　but　in　answer　to　our　reply；　‘‘Oh；　you　said　more　than　that；''　she　blurted　out；　‘‘Well；　I　said　14。''　　It　was　quite　evident　she　remembered　this；　as　well　as　certain　other　exaggerated　statements　and　figures　in　the　letter。

We　were　fortunate　enough　to　be　able　to　analyze　out　much　of　the　genesis　of　this　girl's　career　as　a　pathological　liar。　　After　the　immediate　situation　was　somewhat　cleared　and　Janet　asserted　she　was　anxious　to　make　a　new　start　in　life；　we　began　our　inquiry　into　beginnings。　　Janet　showed　willingness　to　enter　into　the　question　of　her　mental　antecedents　and　tendencies　which　she　maintained　she　heartily　deplored。　　To　be　sure　we　had　evidence　that　even　in　her　most　sincere　moments　she　was　unable　to　refrain　from　occasional　falsifying；　but　the　main　facts　seemed　self…evidently　true；　and　some　of　them　were　corroborated　at　interviews　with　the　parents。

After　considering　her　own　career　with　us　for　a　time；　she　asserted　that　it　now　was　clear　to　her　just　how　and　when　she　began　lying。　　As　a　child　of　about　12　years　it　seems　she　was　wont　to　meet　with　a　certain　group　of　girls　on　a　hillside　and　they　indulged　in　many　conversations　about　sex　matters。　　Evidently　the　circumstances　surrounding　this　important　introduction　into　affairs　of　sex　life　were　indelibly　impressed　upon　her　mind。　　She　was　there　instructed　not　only　in　the　general　facts；　but　also　in　methods　of　self…gratification。　　It　is　clear　to　her；　she　states；　that　it　was　exactly　at　this　time　that　she　first　began　deceiving　her　mother　and　telling　lies。　　She　explains　these　tendencies　as　the　result　of　a　guilty　conscience。　　It　comes　out　that　the　mother　did　not　know　this　group　of　girls　to　be　undesirable　companions　for　Janet；　but　the　latter's　consciousness　of　their　frailties　always　led　her　to　state　that　she　had　been　with　other　children　when　in　reality　she　had　been　in　this　bad　companionship。　　Through　dwelling　on　their　teachings　she　began　sex　practices　by　herself；　and　in　order　to　carry　this　out　she　had　to　indulge　in　other　deceptions。　　She　remembers　distinctly　her　willful　repression　of　the　facts；　and　states　that　the　nervousness　which　she　displayed　for　two　or　three　years　in　her　school　work　was　undoubtedly　due　to　this　cause。　　In　fact；　she　thought　so　at　the　time；　but　persisted　in　deceiving　her　mother　and　her　physician　in　regard　to　the　matter。

Her　mental　repressions　and　conflicts　did　not　begin；　however；　at　this　period。　　By　digging　further　into　her　memory　Janet　tells　us　about　a　girl　in　another　town　where　they　used　to　live；　a　girl　who；　when　Janet　was　about　7　years　old；　wanted　to　show　her　about　sex　practices。　　Janet　knew　this　girl　to　be　bad　by　general　reputation；　and　ran　away　when　this　offer　was　made；　but　it　was　too　latethe　mental　impress　had　been　formed。　　She　thinks　her　mother　would　remember　this　girl。　　The　things　which　this　bad　girl　started　to　tell　came　frequently　up　in　Janet's　mind　and　she　wondered　much　about　them。　　No　practices；　however；　were　indulged　in　and　even　the　thoughts　were　fought　against　until　the　time　mentioned　above　when　other　sex　ideas　were　implanted。　　Janet's　mother　had　neither　given　nor　received　confidences　on　this　subject；　and　indeed　never　throughout　the　daughter's　life　has　there　been　anything　except　vague　warnings　on　the　part　of　the　mother　about　the　general　dangers　of　sex　immorality。

We　gradually　came　to　learn　that　Janet　had　been　subject　to　much　sex　temptation　from　her　own　physical　feelings。　　She　never　was　a　good　sleeper；　she　thinks；　and　she　often　lies　awake；　or　will　wake　up　for　a　time　in　the　middle　of　the　night　and　think　of　sex　affairs。　　She　feels　sure　there　has　been　considerable　stress　upon　her　on　account　of　this　temptation　which　she　has　felt　should　be　combated。　　The　occasional　giving　way　to　sex　habits　also　resulted　in　mental　stress　and；　as　she　expresses　it；　worry。

At　the　time　of　her　failure　to　do　well　in　school　work　her　internal　conflicts　were　especially　acute。　　There　was　before　her　continually　the　success　which　the　other　members　of　her　family　had　made；　which　she　herself　admired；　and　for　which　she　was　ambitious。　　She　hid　at　that　time　the　cause　of　her　nervousness　and　failure；　there　was　the　danger　of　its　being　discovered。　　After　thus　reviewing　her　case　with　us；　Janet　reiterated　that　she　was　sure　her　tendency　to　prevaricate　came　on　at　the　time　when　she　first　began　her　bad　sex　habits。

This　girl　was　probably　not　much　of　a　day…dreamer。　　She　denies　being　so；　saying　she　had　always　been　too　busy　for　such　to　be　the　case。　　We　also　obtained　corroboration　of　this　from　others　who　had　closely　observed　her。　　She　says　she　had　lived　no　specially　imaginative　life　beyond　occasionally　thinking　of　herself　as　a　well…to…do　lady　with　many　good　clothes　to　wear；　or　sometimes　lying　in　bed　and　imagining　she　had　a　lover　there。　　Further　inquiry　into　her　imaginative　life　seemed　futile　because　she　was　not　trained　in　introspection　and　because　even　in　her　frankest　moments　we　were　always　afraid　that　she　might　fall　into　her　strongly　formed　habit　of　prevarication。　　We　ascertained　that　in　her　home　li