beasts and superbeasts-第17章

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forgot　if　I'd　told　you。〃



〃To　be　exact　you　told　me　that　it　weighed　just　under　

two　pounds；　but　I　took　into　account　the　fact　that　

abnormal　vegetables　and　freshwater　fish　have　an　after…

life；　in　which　growth　is　not　arrested。〃



〃You're　just　like　the　others；〃　said　Blenkinthrope　

sadly；　〃you　only　make　fun　of　it。〃



〃The　fault　is　with　the　potato；　not　with　us；〃　said　

Gorworth；　〃we　are　not　in　the　least　interested　in　it　

because　it　is　not　in　the　least　interesting。　　The　men　you　

go　up　in　the　train　with　every　day　are　just　in　the　same　

case　as　yourself；　their　lives　are　commonplace　and　not　

very　interesting　to　themselves；　and　they　certainly　are　

not　going　to　wax　enthusiastic　over　the　commonplace　events　

in　other　men's　lives。　　Tell　them　something　startling；　

dramatic；　piquant　that　has　happened　to　yourself　or　to　

someone　in　your　family；　and　you　will　capture　their　

interest　at　once。　　They　will　talk　about　you　with　a　

certain　personal　pride　to　all　their　acquaintances。　　'Man　

I　know　intimately；　fellow　called　Blenkinthrope；　lives　

down　my　way；　had　two　of　his　fingers　clawed　clean　off　by　a　

lobster　he　was　carrying　home　to　supper。　　Doctor　says　

entire　hand　may　have　to　come　off。'　　Now　that　is　

conversation　of　a　very　high　order。　　But　imagine　walking　

into　a　tennis　club　with　the　remark：　'I　know　a　man　who　has　

grown　a　potato　weighing　two　and　a　quarter　pounds。'〃



〃But　hang　it　all；　my　dear　fellow；〃　said　

Blenkinthrope　impatiently；　〃haven't　I　just　told　you　that　

nothing　of　a　remarkable　nature　ever　happens　to　me？〃



〃Invent　something；〃　said　Gorworth。　　Since　winning　a　

prize　for　excellence　in　Scriptural　knowledge　at　a　

preparatory　school　he　had　felt　licensed　to　be　a　little　

more　unscrupulous　than　the　circle　he　moved　in。　　Much　

might　surely　be　excused　to　one　who　in　early　life　could　

give　a　list　of　seventeen　trees　mentioned　in　the　Old　

Testament。



〃What　sort　of　thing？〃asked　Blenkinthrope；　somewhat　

snappishly。



〃A　snake　got　into　your　hen…run　yesterday　morning　and　

killed　six　out　of　seven　pullets；　first　mesmerising　them　

with　its　eyes　and　then　biting　them　as　they　stood　

helpless。　　The　seventh　pullet　was　one　of　that　French　

sort；　with　feathers　all　over　its　eyes；　so　it　escaped　the　

mesmeric　snare；　and　just　flew　at　what　it　could　see　of　the　

snake　and　pecked　it　to　pieces。〃



〃Thank　you；〃　said　Blenkinthrope　stiffly；　〃it's　a　

very　clever　invention。　　If　such　a　thing　had　really　

happened　in　my　poultry…run　I　admit　I　should　have　been　

proud　and　interested　to　tell　people　about　it。　　But　I'd　

rather　stick　to　fact；　even　if　it　is　plain　fact。〃　　All　the　

same　his　mind　dwelt　wistfully　on　the　story　of　the　Seventh　

Pullet。　　He　could　picture　himself　telling　it　in　the　train　

amid　the　absorbed　interest　of　his　fellow…passengers。　　

Unconsciously　all　sorts　of　little　details　and　

improvements　began　to　suggest　themselves。



Wistfulness　was　still　his　dominant　mood　when　he　took　

his　seat　in　the　railway　carriage　the　next　morning。　　

Opposite　him　sat　Stevenham；　who　had　attained　to　a　

recognised　brevet　of　importance　through　the　fact　of　an　

uncle　having　dropped　dead　in　the　act　of　voting　at　a　

Parliamentary　election。　　That　had　happened　three　years　

ago；　but　Stevenham　was　still　deferred　to　on　all　questions　

of　home　and　foreign　politics。



〃Hullo；　how's　the　giant　mushroom；　or　whatever　it　

was？〃　was　all　the　notice　Blenkinthrope　got　from　his　

fellow　travellers。



Young　Duckby；　whom　he　mildly　disliked；　speedily　

monopolised　the　general　attention　by　an　account　of　a　

domestic　bereavement。



〃Had　four　young　pigeons　carried　off　last　night　by　a　

whacking　big　rat。　　Oh；　a　monster　he　must　have　been；　you　

could　tell　by　the　size　of　the　hole　he　made　breaking　into　

the　loft。〃



No　moderate…sized　rat　ever　seemed　to　carry　out　any　

predatory　operations　in　these　regions；　they　were　all　

enormous　in　their　enormity。



〃Pretty　hard　lines　that；〃　continued　Duckby；　seeing　

that　he　had　secured　the　attention　and　respect　of　the　

company；　〃four　squeakers　carried　off　at　one　swoop。　　You'd　

find　it　rather　hard　to　match　that　in　the　way　of　unlooked…

for　bad　luck。〃



〃I　had　six　pullets　out　of　a　pen　of　seven　killed　by　a　

snake　yesterday　afternoon；〃　said　Blenkinthrope；　in　a　

voice　which　he　hardly　recognised　as　his　own。



〃By　a　snake？〃　came　in　excited　chorus。



〃It　fascinated　them　with　its　deadly；　glittering　

eyes；　one　after　the　other；　and　struck　them　down　while　

they　stood　helpless。　　A　bedridden　neighbour；　who　wasn't　

able　to　call　for　assistance；　witnessed　it　all　from　her　

bedroom　window。〃



〃Well；　I　never！〃　broke　in　the　chorus；　with　

variations。



〃The　interesting　part　of　it　is　about　the　seventh　

pullet；　the　one　that　didn't　get　killed；〃　resumed　

Blenkinthrope；　slowly　lighting　a　cigarette。　　His　

diffidence　had　left　him；　and　he　was　beginning　to　realise　

how　safe　and　easy　depravity　can　seem　once　one　has　the　

courage　to　begin。　　〃The　six　dead　birds　were　Minorcas；　the　

seventh　was　a　Houdan　with　a　mop　of　feathers　all　over　its　

eyes。　　It　could　hardly　see　the　snake　at　all；　so　of　course　

it　wasn't　mesmerised　like　the　others。　　It　just　could　see　

something　wriggling　on　the　ground；　and　went　for　it　and　

pecked　it　to　death。〃



〃Well；　I'm　blessed！〃　exclaimed　the　chorus。



In　the　course　of　the　next　few　days　Blenkinthrope　

discovered　how　little　the　loss　of　one's　self…respect　

affects　one　when　one　has　gained　the　esteem　of　the　world。　　

His　story　found　its　way　into　one　of　the　poultry　papers；　

and　was　copied　thence　into　a　daily　news…sheet　as　a　matter　

of　general　interest。　　A　lady　wrote　from　the　North　of　

Scotland　recounting　a　similar　episode　which　she　had　

witnessed　as　occurring　between　a　stoat　and　a　blind　

grouse。　　Somehow　a　lie　seems　so　much　less　reprehensible　

when　one　can　call　it　a　lee。



For　awhile　the　adapter　of　the　Seventh　Pullet　story　

enjoyed　to　the　full　his　altered　standing　as　a　person　of　

consequence；　one　who　had　had　some　share　in　the　strange　

events　of　his　times。　　Then　he　was　thrust　once　again　into　

the　cold　grey　background　by　the　sudden　blossoming　into　

importance　of　Smith…Paddon；　a　daily　fellow…traveller；　

whose　little　girl　had　been　knocked　down　and　nearly　hurt　

by　a　car　belonging　to　a　musical…comedy　actress。　　The　

actress　was　not　in　the　car　at　the　time；　but　she　was　in　

numerous　photographs　which　appeared　in　the　illustrated　

papers　of　Zoto　Dobreen　inquiring　after　the　well…being　of　

Maisie；　daughter　of　Edmund　Smith…Paddon；　Esq。　　With　this　

new　human　interest　to　absorb　them　the　travelling　

companions　were　almost　rude　when　Blenkinthrope　tried　to　

explain　his　contrivance　for　keeping　vipers　and　peregrine　

falcons　out　of　his　chicken…run。



Gorworth；　to　whom　he　unburdened　himself　in　private；　

gave　him　the　same　counsel　as　heretofore。



〃Invent　something。〃



〃Yes；　but　what？〃



The　ready　affirmative　coupled　with　the　question　

betrayed　a　significant　shifting　of　the　ethical　

standpoint。



It　was　a　few　days　later　that　Blenkinthrope　revealed　

a　chapter　of　family　history　to　the　customary　gathering　in　

the　railway　carriage。



〃Curious　thing　happened　to　my　aunt；　the　one　who　

lives　in　Paris；〃　he　began。　　He　had　several　aunts；　but　

they　were　all　geographically　distributed　over　Greater　

London。



〃She　was　sitting　on　a　seat　in　the　Bois　the　other　

afternoon；　after　lunching　at　the　Roumanian　Legation。〃



Whatever　the　story　gained　in　picturesqueness　from　

the　dragging…in　of　diplomatic　〃atmosphere；〃　it　ceased　

from　that　moment　to　command　any　acceptance　as　a　record　of　

current　events。　　Gorworth　had　warned　his　neophyte　that　

this　would　be　the　case；　but　the　traditional　enthusiasm　of　

the　neophyte　had　triumphed　over　discretion。



〃She　was　feeling　rather　drowsy；　the　effect　probably　

of　the　champagne；　which　she's　not　in　the　habit　of　taking　

in　the　middle　of　the　day。〃



A　subdued　murmur　of　admiration　went　round　the　

company。　　Blenkinthrope's　aunts　were　n