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the bab ballads(依下酎劵)-及10嫗

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     For hours and hours that dismal actor walked�察�And talked�察�and talked�察�

and   talked�察  �and   talked�察  �Till   lethargy   upon   the   parson   crept�察 �And   sleepy 

MICAH SOWLS serenely slept。 

     He slept away until The farce that closed the bill Had warned him not 

to stay�察�And then he went away。 

     ;I   thought   MY   gait   ridiculous�察─  �said   he   ´   ;MY   elocution   faulty   as 

could be�察�I thought I mumbled on a matchless plan ´ I had not seen our 

great Tragedian� �

     ;Forgive   me�察  �if   you   can�察  �O   great   Tragedian�   �I   own   it   with   a   sigh   ´ 

You're drearier than I� ─�



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            Ballad�此�A Discontented Sugar 

                                    Broker 



    A GENTLEMAN of City fame Now claims your kind attention�察�East 

India   broking   was   his   game�察  �His   name   I   shall   not   mention�此  �No   one   of 

finely´pointed sense Would violate a confidence�察�And shall I go And do it�拭�

No� �His name I shall not mention。 

     He had a trusty wife and true�察�And very cosy quarters�察�A manager�察�a 

boy or two�察�Six clerks�察�and seven porters。 A broker must be doing well ��As 

any lunatic can tell�� Who can employ An active boy�察�Six clerks�察�and seven 

porters。 

     His knocker advertised no dun�察�No losses made him sulky�察�He had one 

sorrow ´ only one ´ He was extremely bulky。 A man must be�察�I beg to state�察�

Exceptionally fortunate Who owns his chief And only grief Is ´ being very 

bulky。 

     ;This   load�察─  �he'd   say�察   �I   cannot   bear�察  �I'm   nineteen   stone   or   twenty� �

Henceforward I'll go in for air And exercise in plenty。; Most people think 

that�察�should it come�察�They can reduce a bulging tum To measures fair By 

taking   air   And   exercise   in   plenty。 In   every   weather�察   �every   day�察 �Dry�察�

muddy�察�wet�察�or gritty�察�He took to dancing all the way From Brompton to 

the City。 You do not often get the chance Of seeing sugar brokers dance 

From their abode In Fulham Road Through Brompton to the City。 

     He braved the gay and guileless laugh Of children with their nusses�察�

The   loud   uneducated   chaff   Of   clerks   on   omnibuses。   Against   all   minor 

things that rack A nicely´balanced mind�察�I'll back The noisy chaff And ill´ 

bred laugh Of clerks on omnibuses。 

     His friends�察�who heard his money chink�察�And saw the house he rented�察�

And   knew   his   wife�察  �could   never   think   What   made   him   discontented。   It 

never entered their pure minds That fads are of eccentric kinds�察�Nor would 

they own That fat alone Could make one discontented。 

     ;Your riches know no kind of pause�察�Your trade is fast advancing�察�You 

dance ´ but not for joy�察�because You weep as you are dancing。 To dance 



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implies that man   is glad�察�To   weep implies that   man is sad�察  �But here   are 

you Who do the two ´ You weep as you are dancing� ─�

     His   mania   soon   got   noised   about   And   into   all   the   papers�察  �His   size 

increased beyond a doubt For all his reckless capers�此�It may seem singular 

to   you�察 �But   all his   friends   admit   it   true   ´ The   more   he   found   His   figure 

round�察�The more he cut his capers。 

     His bulk increased ´ no matter that ´ He tried the more to toss it ´ He 

never spoke of it as ;fat�察─�But ;adipose deposit。; Upon my word�察�it seems 

to   me   Unpardonable   vanity   ��And   worse   than   that��   To   call   your   fat   An 

;adipose deposit。; 

     At length his brawny knees gave way�察�And on the carpet sinking�察�Upon 

his shapeless back he lay And kicked away like winking。 Instead of seeing 

in his state The finger of unswerving Fate�察�He laboured still To work his 

will�察�And kicked away like winking。 

     His   friends�察  �disgusted   with   him   now�察  �Away   in   silence   wended       ´   I 

hardly like to tell you how This dreadful story ended。 The shocking sequel 

to impart�察�I must employ the limner's art ´ If you would know�察�This sketch 

will show How his exertions ended。 

     MORAL。 

     I hate to preach ´ I hate to prate ´ ´ I'm no fanatic croaker�察�But learn 

contentment from the fate Of this East India broker。 He'd everything a man 

of taste Could ever want�察�except a waist�察�And discontent His size anent�察�

And bootless perseverance blind�察�Completely wrecked the peace of mind 

Of this East India broker。 



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        Ballad�此�The Pantomime ;Super; 

                              To His Mask 



     Vast   empty    shell�   �Impertinent�察   �preposterous     abortion�    �With   vacant 

stare�察   �And    ragged    hair�察  �And    every    feature   out   of   all  proportion� �

Embodiment   of   echoing   inanity�   �Excellent   type   of   simpering   insanity� �

Unwieldy�察�clumsy nightmare of humanity� �I ring thy knell� �

     To´night   thou   diest�察  �Beast   that   destroy'st   my   heaven´born     identity� �

Nine     weeks     of  nights�察  �Before     the   lights�察 �Swamped       in  thine    own 

preposterous nonentity�察�I've been ill´treated�察�cursed�察�and thrashed diurnally�察�

Credited for the smile you wear externally ´ I feel disposed to smash thy 

face�察�infernally�察�As there thou liest� �

     I've been thy brain�此�I'VE been the brain that lit thy dull concavity� �The 

human race Invest MY face With thine expression of unchecked depravity�察�

Invested     with    a  ghastly    reciprocity�察  �I'VE    been    responsible     for  thy 

monstrosity�察�I�察�for thy wanton�察�blundering ferocity ´ But not again� �

     'T is   time   to   toll Thy  knell�察 �and that of   follies pantomimical�此�A nine 

weeks' run�察�And thou hast done All thou canst do to make thyself inimical。 

Adieu�察  �embodiment   of   all   inanity�   �Excellent   type   of   simpering   insanity� �

Unwieldy�察�clumsy nightmare of humanity� �Freed is thy soul� �

     ��THE MASK RESPONDETH。�� 

     Oh�  �master   mine�察 �Look thou   within   thee�察 �ere  again ill´using   me。 Art 

thou aware Of nothing there Which might abuse thee�察�as thou art abusing 

me�拭�A brain that mourns THINE unredeemed rascality�拭�A soul that weeps 

at   THY  threadbare   morality�拭  �Both   grieving   that   THEIR   individuality   Is 

merged in thine�拭�



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         Ballad�此�The Force Of Argument 



    Lord B。 was a nobleman bold Who came of illustrious stocks�察�He was 

thirty or forty years old�察�And several feet in his socks。 

    To   Turniptopville´by´the´Sea   This   elegant   nobleman   went�察  �For   that 

was a borough that he Was anxious to rep´per´re´sent。 

    At local assemblies he danced Until he felt thoroughly ill�察�He waltzed�察�

and he galoped�察�and lanced�察�And threaded the mazy quadrille。 

    The maidens of Turniptopville Were simple ´ ingenuous ´ pure ´ And 

they all worked away with a will The nobleman's heart to secure。 

    Two maidens all others beyond Endeavoured his cares to dispel ´ The 

one was the lively ANN POND�察�The other sad MARY MORELL。 

    ANN POND had determined to try And carry the Earl with a rush�察�Her 

principal feature was eye�察�Her greatest accomplishment ´ gush。 

    And MARY chose this  for her  play�此�Whenever  he looked   in her  eye 

She'd blush and turn quickly away�察�And flitter�察�and flutter�察�and sigh。 

    It was noticed he constantly sighed As she worked out the scheme she 

had planned�察�A fact he endeavoured to hide With his aristocratical hand。 

    Old     POND     was   a  farmer�察  �they   say�察 �And    so  was    old  TOMMY 

MORELL。 In a humble and pottering way They were doing exceedingly 

well。 

    They both of them carr

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