the lifted veil(述軟議中百)-及4嫗
梓囚徒貧圭�鮗� ○ 賜 ★ 辛酔堀貧和鍬匈��梓囚徒貧議 Enter 囚辛指欺云慕朕村匈��梓囚徒貧圭�鮗� ● 辛指欺云匈競何��
!!!!隆堋響頼��紗秘慕禰厮宴和肝写偬堋響��
progress of consumption�拭�
When my mind had dwelt for some time on this blissful idea�察 �it
seemed to me that I might perhaps test it by an exertion of my will。 The
vision had begun when my father was speaking of our going to Prague。 I
did not for a moment believe it was really a representation of that city�察�I
believedI hoped it was a picture that my newly liberated genius had
painted in fiery haste�察 �with the colours snatched from lazy memory。
Suppose I were to fix my mind on some other placeVenice�察�for example�察�
which was far more familiar to my imagination than Prague�此 �perhaps the
same sort of result would follow。 I concentrated my thoughts on Venice�察�
I stimulated my imagination with poetic memories�察 �and strove to feel
myself present in Venice�察 �as I had felt myself present in Prague。 But in
vain。 I was only colouring the Canaletto engravings that hung in my old
bedroom at home�察 �the picture was a shifting one�察 �my mind wandering
uncertainly in search of more vivid images�察 �I could see no accident of
form or shadow without conscious labour after the necessary conditions。
It was all prosaic effort�察�not rapt passivity�察�such as I had experienced half
an hour before。 I was discouraged�察 �but I remembered that inspiration
was fitful。
For several days I was in a state of excited expectation�察�watching for a
recurrence of my new gift。 I sent my thoughts ranging over my world of
knowledge�察 �in the hope that they would find some object which would
send a reawakening vibration through my slumbering genius。 But no�察�my
world remained as dim as ever�察�and that flash of strange light refused to
come again�察�though I watched for it with palpitating eagerness。
My father accompanied me every day in a drive�察 �and a gradually
lengthening walk as my powers of walking increased�察�and one evening he
had agreed to come and fetch me at twelve the next day�察�that we might go
together to select a musical box�察�and other purchases rigorously demanded
of a rich Englishman visiting Geneva。 He was one of the most punctual
of men and bankers�察�and I was always nervously anxious to be quite ready
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for him at the appointed time。 But�察�to my surprise�察�at a quarter past twelve
he had not appeared。 I felt all the impatience of a convalescent who has
nothing particular to do�察�and who has just taken a tonic in the prospect of
immediate exercise that would carry off the stimulus。
Unable to sit still and reserve my strength�察�I walked up and down the
room�察 �looking out on the current of the Rhone�察 �just where it leaves the
dark´blue lake�察�but thinking all the while of the possible causes that could
detain my father。
Suddenly I was conscious that my father was in the room�察 �but not
alone�此 �there were two persons with him。 Strange� �I had heard no
footstep�察�I had not seen the door open�察�but I saw my father�察�and at his right
hand our neighbour Mrs。 Filmore�察�whom I remembered very well�察�though
I had not seen her for five years。 She was a commonplace middle´aged
woman�察�in silk and cashmere�察�but the lady on the left of my father was not
more than twenty�察�a tall�察�slim�察�willowy figure�察�with luxuriant blond hair�察�
arranged in cunning braids and folds that looked almost too massive for
the slight figure and the small´featured�察 �thin´lipped face they crowned。
But the face had not a girlish expression�此 �the features were sharp�察 �the
pale grey eyes at once acute�察�restless�察�and sarcastic。 They were fixed on
me in half´smiling curiosity�察 �and I felt a painful sensation as if a sharp
wind were cutting me。 The pale´green dress�察�and the green leaves that
seemed to form a border about her pale blond hair�察 �made me think of a
Water´Nixiefor my mind was full of German lyrics�察�and this pale�察�fatal´
eyed woman�察 �with the green weeds�察 �looked like a birth from some cold
sedgy stream�察�the daughter of an aged river。
;Well�察�Latimer�察�you thought me long�察─�my father said 。 。 。
But while the last word was in my ears�察�the whole group vanished�察�and
there was nothing between me and the Chinese printed folding´ screen that
stood before the door。 I was cold and trembling�察 �I could only totter
forward and throw myself on the sofa。 This strange new power had
manifested itself again 。 。 。 But WAS it a power�拭 �Might it not rather be a
diseasea sort of intermittent delirium�察�concentrating my energy of brain
into moments of unhealthy activity�察 �and leaving my saner hours all the
more barren�拭�I felt a dizzy sense of unreality in what my eye rested on�察�I
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grasped the bell convulsively�察 �like one trying to free himself from
nightmare�察 �and rang it twice。 Pierre came with a look of alarm in his
face。
;Monsieur ne se trouve pas bien�拭─�he said anxiously。
;I'm tired of waiting�察�Pierre�察─�I said�察�as distinctly and emphatically as I
could�察 �like a man determined to be sober in spite of wine�察 �I'm afraid
something has happened to my fatherhe's usually so punctual。 Run to
the Hotel des Bergues and see if he is there。;
Pierre left the room at once�察�with a soothing ;Bien�察�Monsieur;�察�and I
felt the better for this scene of simple�察 �waking prose。 Seeking to calm
myself still further�察 �I went into my bedroom�察 �adjoining the salon�察 �and
opened a case of eau´de´Cologne�察 �took out a bottle�察 �went through the
process of taking out the cork very neatly�察 �and then rubbed the reviving
spirit over my hands and forehead�察�and under my nostrils�察�drawing a new
delight from the scent because I had procured it by slow details of labour�察�
and by no strange sudden madness。 Already I had begun to taste
something of the horror that belongs to the lot of a human being whose
nature is not adjusted to simple human conditions。
Still enjoying the scent�察 �I returned to the salon�察 �but it was not
unoccupied�察 �as it had been before I left it。 In front of the Chinese
folding´screen there was my father�察�with Mrs。 Filmore on his right hand�察�
and on his leftthe slim�察�blond´haired girl�察�with the keen face and the keen
eyes fixed on me in half´smiling curiosity。
;Well�察�Latimer�察�you thought me long�察─�my father said 。 。 。
I heard no more�察�felt no more�察�till I became conscious that I was lying
with my head low on the sofa�察�Pierre�察�and my father by my side。 As soon
as I was thoroughly revived�察 �my father left the room�察 �and presently
returned�察�saying ´
;I've been to tell the ladies how you are�察�Latimer。 They were waiting
in the next room。 We shall put off our shopping expedition to´day。;
Presently he said�察 �That young lady is Bertha Grant�察 �Mrs。 Filmore's
orphan niece。 Filmore has adopted her�察�and she lives with them�察�so you
will have her for a neighbour when