hard cash-第158章

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！



Julia　bowed　her　head　submissively　and　went　to　her　duties。　But　when　Alfred　came　to　her　open…mouthed　to　complain　of　her　mother's　cruelty；　she　stopped　him　at　once；　and　asked　him　how　he　could　go　and　write　that　foolish；　unreasonable　letter。　Why　had　he　not　consulted　her　first？　〃You　have　subjected　yourself　to　a　rebuff；〃　said　she　angrily；　〃and　one　from　which　I　should　have　saved　you。　Is　it　nothing　that　mamma　out　of　pity　to　me　connives　at　our　meeting　and　spending　hours　together？　Do　you　think　she　does　no　violence　to　her　own　wishes　here？　and　is　she　to　meet　with　no　return？〃

〃What；　are　you　against　me　too？〃　said　poor　Alfred。

〃No；　it　is　you　who　are　our　enemy　with　your　unreasonable　impatience。〃

〃I　am　not　so　cold…blooded　as　you　are；　certainly。〃

〃Humility　and　penitence　would　become　you　better　than　to　retort　on　me。　I　love　you　both；　and　pray　God　on　my　knees　to　show　me　how　to　do　my　duty　to　both。〃

〃That　is　it；　you　are　not　single…hearted　like　me。　You　want　to　please　all　the　world；　and　reconcile　the　irreconcilable。　It　won't　do：　you　will　have　to　choose　between　your　mother　and　me　at　last。〃

〃Then　of　course　I　shall　choose　my　mother。〃

〃Why？〃

〃Because　she　claims　my　duty　as　well　as　my　love；　because　she　is　bowed　down　with　sorrow；　and　needs　her　daughter　just　now　more　than　you　do；　besides；　you　are　my　other　self；　and　we　must　deny　ourselves。〃

〃We　have　no　more　right　to　be　unjust　to　ourselves　than　to　anybody　else；　injustice　is　injustice。〃

〃Alfred；　you　are　a　high…minded　Heathen；　and　talk　Morality。　Morality　is　a　snare。　What　I　pray　to　be　is　a　Christian；　as　your　dear　sister　was；　and　to　deny　myself；　and　you　make　it；　oh　so　difficult。〃

〃So　I　suppose　it　will　end　in　turning　out　your　heathen　and　then　taking　your　curate。　Your　mother　would　consent　to　that　directly。〃

〃Alfred；〃　said　Julia　with　dignity；　〃these　words　are　harsh；　andforgive　me　for　saying　sothey　are　coarse。　Such　words　would　separate　us　two；　without　my　mother；　if　I　were　to　hear　many　of　them；　for　they　take　the　bloom　off　affection；　and　that　mutual　reverence；　without　which　no　gentleman　and　lady　could　be　blessed　in　holy　wedlock。〃

Alfred　was　staggered　and　mortified　too：　they　walked　on　in　silence　now。

〃Alfred；〃　said　Julia　at　last；　〃do　not　think　me　behind　you　in　affection；　but　wiser；　for　once；　and　our　best　friend。　I　do　think　we　had　better　see　less　of　one　another　for　a　time；　my　poor　Alfred。〃

〃And　why　for　a　time？　Why　not　for　ever？〃

〃If　your　heart　draws　no　distinction；　why　not　indeed？〃

〃So　be　it　then：　for　I　will　be　no　woman's　slave。　There's　my　hand；　Julia：　let　us　part　friends。〃

〃Thank　you　for　that；　dear　Alfred：　may　you　find　some　one　who　can　love　you　morethanI　do。〃

The　words　choked　her。　But　he　was　stronger；　because　he　was　in　a　passion。　He　reproached　her　bitterly。　〃If　I　had　been　as　weak　and　inconstant　as　you　are；　I　might　have　been　out　of　Drayton　House　long　before　I　did　escape。　But　I　was　faithful　to　my　one　love。　I　have　some　right　to　sing　'Aileen　Aroon；'　you　have　none。　You　are　an　angel　of　beauty　and　goodness；　you　will　go　to　Heaven；　and　I　shall　go　to　the　devil　now　for　want　of　you；　but　then　you　have　no　constancy　nor　true　fidelity：　so　that　has　parted　us；　and　now　nothing　is　left　me　but　to　try　and　hate　you。〃

He　turned　furiously　on　his　heel。

〃God　bless　you；　go　where　you　will；〃　faltered　Julia。

He　replied　with　a　fierce　ejaculation　of　despair；　and　dashed　away。

Thus　temper　and　misunderstanding　triumphed；　after　so　many　strange　and　bitter　trials　had　failed。

But　alas！　it　is　often　so。



CHAPTER　XLIX。

Both　the　parted　lovers　were　wretched。　Julia　never　complained；　but　drooped；　and　read　the　Psalms；　and　Edward　detected　her　in　tears　over　them。　He　questioned　her　and　obtained　a　lame　account；　she　being　far　more　bent　on　screening　Alfred　than　on　telling　the　truth。

Edward　called　on　the　other；　and　found　him　disconsolate；　and　reading　a　Heathen　philosopher　for　comfort；　and　finding　none。　Edward　questioned　him；　and　he　was　reserved　and　even　sulky。　Sir　Imperturbable　persisted　quietly；　and　he　exploded；　and　out　came　his　wrongs。　Edward　replied　that　he　was　a　pretty　fellow：　wanted　it　all　his　own　way。　〃Suppose　my　mother；　with　her　present　feelings；　was　to　take　a　leaf　out　of　your　book；　and　use　all　her　power；　where　would　you　be　then？　Come；　old　fellow；　I　know　what　love　is；　and　one　of　us　_shall_　have　the　girl　he　loves；　unless　any　harm　should　come　to　my　poor　father　owing　to　your　blunderoh；　that　would　put　it　out　of　the　question；　I　feelbut　let　us　hope　better。　I　pulled　you　out　of　the　fire；　and　somehow　I　seem　to　like　you　better　than　ever　after　that；　let　me　pull　you　out　of　this　mess　too。〃

〃Pull　away；〃　cried　the　impetuous　youth。　〃I'll　trust　you　with　my　life：　ay；　with　more　than　my　life；　with　my　love；　for　you　are　the　man　for　me：　reason　is　always　uppermost　with　you：

　　　　　Give　me　the　man　that　is　not　passion's　slave；　　　　　　And　I　will　wear　him　in　my　heart's　core；　ay〃

〃Oh　bother　that。　If　you　are　in　earnest；　don't　mouth；　but　put　on　your　hat　and　come　over。〃

He　assented；　but　in　the　middle　of　putting　on　his　coat；　made　this　little　observation：　〃Now　I　see　how　wise　the　ancients　were：　yes；　friendship　is　better　than　love；　calmer；　more　constant；　free　from　the　heats　and　chills　of　that　impetuous　passion；　its　pure　bosom　is　ruffled　by　none　of　love's　jealousies　and　irritabilities。　Solem　e　mundo　tollunt　qui　tollunt　amicitiam。〃

〃Oh　bother　quoting；　come　and　shake　hands　with　Julia。〃　They　went　over；　Mrs。　Dodd　was　in　the　city。　Edward　ushered　in　Alfred；　saying；　〃Here　is　the　other　Impetuosity；〃　and　sagely　retired　for　a　few　minutes。　When　he　came　back　they　were　sitting　hand　in　hand；　he　gazing　on　her；　she　inspecting　the　carpet。　〃That　is　all　right；〃　said　Edward　drily：　〃now　the　next　thing　is；　you　must　go　back　to　Oxford　directly；　and　read　for　your　first　class。〃

The　proposal　fell　like　a　blight　upon　the　reconciled　lovers。　But　Edward　gave　potent　reasons。　The　delays　of　law　were　endless：　Alfred's　defendant　had　already　obtained　one　postponement　of　the　trial　on　frivolous　grounds。　Now　the　Oxford　examination　and　Doncaster　races　come　on　at　a　fixed　date；　by　a　Law　of　Nature；　and　admit　of　no　〃postponement　swindle。〃　〃You　mark　my　words；　you　will　get　your　class　before　you　will　get　your　trial；　and　it　won't　hurt　you　to　go　into　court　a　first…class　man：　will　it？　And　then　you　won't　quarrel　by　letter；　you　two；　I　know。　Come；　will　you　do　what　I　tell　you：　or　is　friendship　but　a　name？　eh；　Mr。　Bombast？〃　He　ended　with　great　though　quiet　force：　〃Come；　you　two；　which　is　better；　to　part　like　the　scissors；　or　part　like　the　thread？〃

Similes　are　no　arguments；　that　is　why　they　convince　people　so：　Alfred　capitulated　to　the　scissors　and　thread；　and　only　asked　with　abnormal　humility　to　be　allowed　to　taste　the　joys　of　reconciliation　for　two　days。　The　third　found　him　at　Oxford；　he　called　on　the　head　of　his　college　to　explain　what　had　prevented　his　return　to　Exeter　in　the　October　term　twelve　months　ago；　and　asked　for　rooms。　Instead　of　siding　with　a　man　of　his　own　college　so　cruelly　injured；　the　dignitary　was　alarmed　by　the　bare　accusation；　and　said　he　must　consider：　insanity　was　a　terrible　thing。

〃So　is　false　accusation；　and　so　is　false　imprisonment；〃　said　Hardie　bitterly。

〃Unquestionably。　But　I　have　at　present　no　means　of　deciding　how　far　those　words　apply。〃　In　short；　he　could　give　no　answer；　must　consult　the　other　officers；　and　would　convey　the　result　by　letter。

Alfred's　pride　was　deeply　mortified；　not　less　by　a　certain　cold　repugnant　manner　than　by　the　words。　And　there　came　over　his　heart　a　sickening　feeling　that　he　was　now　in　the　eyes　of　men　an　intellectual　leper。

He　went　to　another　college　directly；　and　applied　to　the　vice…president；　the　vice…president　sent　him　with　a　letter　to　the　dean；　the　dean　looked　frightened；　and　told　him　hesitatingly　the　college　was　full；　he　might　put　his　name　down；　and　perhaps　get　in　next　year。　Alfred　retired；　and　learned　from　the　porter　that　the　college　was　not　full。　He　sighed　deeply；　and　the　sickening　feeling　grew　on　him；　an　ineradicable　stigma　seemed　upon　him；　and　Mrs。　Dodd　was　no　worse　than　the　rest　of　the　world　then；　every　mother　in　England　would　approve　her　resolutions。　He　wandered　about　the　scenes　of　his　intellectual　triumphs：　he　stood　in　the　great　square　of　the　schools；　a　place　ugly　to　unprejudiced　eyes；　but　witha