the crime of sylvestre bonnard(西维斯特·博拉德的罪行)-第5章
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years； with age； he degenerated； and sometimes yielded to fear。 But at that
time he used to fear nothing。
I was unhappy。 An unreasoning but irresistible shame prevented me
from telling my mother about the object of my love。 Thence all my
sufferings。 For many days that doll； incessantly present in fancy； danced
before my eyes； stared at me fixedly； opened her arms to me； assuming in
my imagination a sort of life which made her appear at once mysterious
and weird； and thereby all the more charming and desirable。
Finally； one daya day I shall never forgetmy nurse took me to see
my uncle； Captain Victor； who had invited me to lunch。 I admired my
uncle a great deal； as much because he had fired the last French cartridge
at Waterloo； as because he used to prepare with his own hands； at my
mother's table； certain chapons…a…l'ail ＇Crust on which garlic has been
rubbed＇； which he afterwards put in the chicory salad。 I thought that was
very fine！ My Uncle Victor also inspired me with much respect by his
frogged coat； and still more by his way of turning the whole house upside
down from the moment he came into it。 Even now I cannot tell just how he
managed it； but I can affirm that whenever my Uncle Victor found himself
in any assembly of twenty persons； it was impossible to see or to hear
anybody but him。 My excellent father； I have reason to believe； never
shared my admiration for Uncle Victor； who used to sicken him with his
pipe； give him great thumps in the back by way of friendliness； and accuse
him of lacking energy。 My mother； though always showing a sister's
indulgence to the Captain； sometimes advised him to fold the brandy…
bottle a little less frequently。 But I had no part either in these repugnances
or these reproaches； and Uncle Victor inspired me with the purest
enthusiasm。 It was therefore with a feeling of pride that I entered into the
little lodging he occupied in the Rue Guenegaud。 The entire lunch； served
on a small table close to the fireplace； consisted of cold meats and
confectionery。
The Captain stuffed me with cakes and undiluted wine。 He told me of
numberless injustices to which he had been a victim。 He complained
particularly of the Bourbons； and as he neglected to tell me who the
Bourbons were； I got the ideaI can't tell howthat the Bourbons were
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The Crime of Sylvestre Bonnard
horse…dealers established at Waterloo。 The Captain； who never interrupted
his talk except for the purpose of pouring out wine； furthermore made
charges against a number of dirty scoundrels； blackguards； and good…for…
nothings whom I did not know anything about； but whom I hated from the
bottom of my heart。 At dessert I thought I heard the Captain say my father
was a man who could be led anywhere by the nose； but I am not quite sure
that I understood him。 I had a buzzing in my ears； and it seemed to me that
the table was dancing。
My uncle put on his frogged coat； took his bell shaped hat； and we
descended to the street； which seemed to me singularly changed。 It looked
to me as if I had not been in it before for ever so long a time。 Nevertheless；
when we came to the Rue de Seine； the idea of my doll suddenly returned
to my mind and excited me in an extraordinary way。 My head was on fire。
I resolved upon a desperate expedient。 We were passing before the
window。 She was there； behind the glasswith her red checks； and her
flowered petticoat； and her long legs。
〃Uncle；〃 I said； with a great effort； 〃will you buy that doll for me？〃
And I waited。
〃Buy a doll for a boysacrebleu！〃 cried my uncle； in a voice of
thunder。 〃Do you wish to dishonour yourself？ And it is that old Mag there
that you want！ Well； I must compliment you； my young fellow！ If you
grow up with such tastes as that； you will never have any pleasure in life；
and your comrades will call you a precious ninny。 If you asked me for a
sword or a gun； my boy； I would buy them for you with the last silver
crown of my pension。 But to buy a doll for youby all that's holy！to
disgrace you！ Never in the world！ Why； if I were ever to see you playing
with a puppet rigged out like that； Monsieur； my sister's son； I would
disown you for my nephew！〃
On hearing these words； I felt my heart so wrung that nothing but
pridea diabolical pridekept me from crying。
My uncle； suddenly calming down； returned to his ideas about the
Bourbons； but I； still smarting under the weight of his indignation； felt an
unspeakable shame。 My resolve was quickly made。 I promised myself
never to disgrace myselfI firmly and for ever renounced that red…cheeked
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The Crime of Sylvestre Bonnard
doll。
I felt that day； for the first time； the austere sweetness of sacrifice。
Captain； though it be true that all your life you swore like a pagan；
smoked like a beadle； and drank like a bell…ringer； be your memory
nevertheless honourednot merely because you were a brave soldier； but
also because you revealed to your little nephew in petticoats the sentiment
of heroism！ Pride and laziness had made you almost insupportable； Uncle
Victor！but a great heart used to beat under those frogs upon your coat。
You always used to wear； I now remember； a rose in your button…hole。
That rose which you offered so readily to the shop…girlsthat large； open…
hearted flower； scattering its petals to all the winds； was the symbol of
your glorious youth。 You despised neither wine nor tobacco； but you
despised life。 Neither delicacy nor common sense could have been learned
from you； Captain； but you taught me； even at an age when my nurse had
to wipe my nose； a lesson of honour and self…abrogation that I shall never
forget。
You have now been sleeping for many years in the Cemetery of Mont…
Parnasse； under a plain slab bearing the epitaph：
CI…GIT ARISTIDE VICTOR MALDENT； Capitaine d'Infanterie；
Chevalier de la Legion d'Honneur。
But such； Captain； was not the inscription devised by yourself to be
placed above those old bones of yoursknocked about so long on fields of
battle and in haunts of pleasure。 Among your papers was found this proud
and bitter epitaph； which； despite your last will none could have ventured
to put upon your tomb：
CI…GIT UN BRIGAND DE LA LOIRE
〃Therese； we will get a wreath of immortelles to…morrow； and lay them
on the tomb of the Brigand of the Loire。〃 。。。
But Therese is not here。 And how； indeed； could she be near me；
seeing that I am at the rondpoint of the Champs…Elysees？ There； at the
termination of the avenue； the Arc de Triomphe； which bears under its
vaults the names of Uncle Victor's companions…in…arms； opens its giant
gate against the sky。 The trees of the avenue are unfolding to the sun of
spring their first leaves； still all
